Simplistic Reviews Podcasts
Simplistic Reviews is everything your parents told you to not turn into. We talk and review movies, TV and games from the past and the present. Light that fire and bring the family in to enjoy, don’t worry if you don’t have a fire because we’ll always bring the warmth. Visit us at www.Simplistic.Reviews
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Episodes
Thursday Jan 14, 2021
Thursday Jan 14, 2021
(This version has the audio of the movie. We have another version without as well)
You ready to be racist brother!
Ready when you are Spence!
Ok Bru lets do this!
Thunder!
When the Sun comes up in paradiseThe girls look prettyOoh they look niceI can smell the cocoa-lotion in the airCool breeze blowin everywhereBetter start running'Cause there's a hurricane a-comin'Grab your Piña colada and a Jamaican, this is Thunder in Paradise 2! (Somehow worse than the last one...yeppie)
Thursday Jan 14, 2021
Thursday Jan 14, 2021
(This version has no audio of the movie. We have another version with movie audio as well)
You ready to be racist brother!
Ready when you are Spence!
Ok Bru lets do this!
Thunder!
When the Sun comes up in paradiseThe girls look prettyOoh they look niceI can smell the cocoa-lotion in the airCool breeze blowin everywhereBetter start running'Cause there's a hurricane a-comin'Grab your Piña colada and a Jamaican, this is Thunder in Paradise 2! (Somehow worse than the last one...yeppie)
Friday Jan 01, 2021
Friday Jan 01, 2021
Break your New Year's resolutions early and enter the world of the Simplistic Reviews podcast. This month, the boys celebrate the end of 2020...briefly. They then delve into what dessert they are gonna gorge themselves on to assuage their depression from the prolonged doom of the pandemic. But don't worry...it's all fun and games as they play four of their favorite movie games to entertain you:
1. Take The F%*king Elephant...a game based on guessing the eerily similar films of Liam Neeson.2. Simplistic Titles...a game based on figuring out which films Valentine describes is real or fake.3. Simplistic Death...a game based on guessing a film based only on the description on how the bad guy dies in the end.4. Simplistic Switcheroo...a game in which the gang theorizes which actor could do another actor's career better.
All that and so much more on this Auld Acquaintance Episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.
Friday Dec 25, 2020
Friday Dec 25, 2020
To close out the year, we thought it would be fun to look back on all the sketches we've done in 2020. Julie is your guide as we go from a John Rambo-esque rant on the Star Wars Cinematic Universe, to the two part Sesame Street Syndicate sketch, to He-Man and the Transformers messing about, to Doctor Doom dentistry, to Scream Shenanigans, to Home Alone fallout, and all the great sketches in between...with a little behind the scenes stuff thrown in. So sit back, relax, and enjoy one last silly show before the year is out.
Tuesday Dec 15, 2020
Tuesday Dec 15, 2020
We love our horror and holiday movie commentaries each year and this one has been on the list. Now we finally get to cross it off...no killer Santa, no killer Elf's...Killer Gingerbread!
An evil yet adorable Gingerbread man comes to life with the soul of a convicted killer - this real life cookie monster wreaks havoc on the girl who sent the killer to the electric chair. Oh and that Ginger is Gary Busey...yep that Busey.
Happy Holidays everyone!
Tuesday Dec 01, 2020
Tuesday Dec 01, 2020
Holiday Hijinks come once a year, and with The Simplistic Reviews here, you should have no fear!
After all the good tidings 2020 has given us, its time to head to The First Korean Church of SR as confessional gets sexy in the newest segment; "Simplistic Confessional with Father Polizzi."
Blue Collar Comedy and The Kings of Comedy talk, Matt giving people their signs, DJ creaming over the life's work of Aaron Sorkin, and so much more in this festive edition of the highest rated podcast of recently divorced dads who are planning on creating an OnlyFans Page to pay for their child support; The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.
Sunday Nov 15, 2020
Sunday Nov 15, 2020
A James Bondish spy and his female assistant infiltrate a group of South American Nazis who have kept Hitler alive until they take over the... using the ultimate weapon.
We are back watching another terrible action film of the 80s. Today, we celebrate the great Sir Sean Connery by watching a knockoff Bond film that is worse in every way you could possibly think off. (Don't worry we will watch the other shitfest in this series).
Trivia: I believe this film is the first film to make the star, the least entertaining person in the film. Maybe it was the actor who just seems not to really want be here. His character seems to just get lost in the story, almost how lost we got watching this damn cluster fuck. Oh and yeah he's "partner" is a baboon.
Let's do this!
Sunday Nov 01, 2020
Sunday Nov 01, 2020
Batman, the Joker, Ra's Al Ghul, Walter Vinci from First Time Watchers...seriously, a whole bunch of people show up on this special Election Edition of the Simplistic Reviews podcast. The boys politic about Hollywood news in the return of Can You Dig It. Julie's Diary reveals your favorite announcer's stance on the upcoming election...kinda. And the boys pick the winners to a couple of battles to the death in another round of Simplistic Fisticuffs. So do your constitutional duty and listen to this brand new episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast.
Friday Oct 30, 2020
Friday Oct 30, 2020
Happy Halloween!
Join us again for 12 hours of 3 very non-productive men sitting around doing nothing but watching 8 films, 6 terrible and 2 good films.
Could it get anymore scary?
Re-live our first annual 12HR Spooktacular! Grab the movies below and watch along with us...if you dare.
Our lineup from the Oct. 17th.
Schedule (EST)
12:00pm - The Funhouse (1981)
1:35pm - Evil Dead (2013)
3:06pm - Break #1
3:11pm - Hellbound (1994)
4:45pm - Monster Dog (1984)
6:10pm - Intermission - Break #2
6:17pm - Soultaker (1990)
7:52pm - Final Destination 5 (2011)
9:14pm - Break #3
9:19pm - Pumpkinhead (1988)
10:45pm - Dracula (1931)
12:00am - End
Thursday Oct 15, 2020
Thursday Oct 15, 2020
Death Spa
R 1989 ‧ Horror/Slasher ‧ 1h 28m
Customers at an exclusive fat farm are haunted by a force which turns exercise equipment into deadly killing machines.
Spooky!
Halloween is right around the corner, so lets watch a movie about exercise equipment killing people! Sounds like one hell of a movie right? We all know COVID-19 came with a lot. Now we need to loss a bit of weight, so come with us as we all signup to loss a few pints of blood. Oh and don't worry about the random murders. Each one banks us a free 3 week gym membership. Grab your LA Looks, that neon shirt and lets hit the gym...or spa...ugh...whatever this is Death Spa!