Simplistic Reviews Podcasts
Simplistic Reviews is everything your parents told you to not turn into. We talk and review movies, TV and games from the past and the present. Light that fire and bring the family in to enjoy, don’t worry if you don’t have a fire because we’ll always bring the warmth. Visit us at www.Simplistic.Reviews
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Episodes
Sunday Jun 20, 2021
Sunday Jun 20, 2021
The Pit | 1981 ‧ Horror ‧ 1h 36m
A solitary and strange preteen boy wreaks revenge on his harassers when he makes a disturbing discovery in the depth of a forest. (From IMDB)
Happy Fathers Day to all the dads out there. Today we go out to the woods and play around a pit with a mystery of which we haven't encountered with before. Let's all spend some quality time together and throw all of our problems into this hole in the ground. Problems, a hole... no this isn't about Shia LaBeouf.
Site: http://SimplisticReviews.net
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Facebook: http://facebook.com/SimplisticReviews
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/simplygramming
iTunes: https://goo.gl/orhsR4
#Movie #Commentary #Horror #ThePit #Podcast
Tuesday Jun 15, 2021
Tuesday Jun 15, 2021
Welcome to Simply 15 Classic Edition. Yes another gimmick from Simplistic Reviews...we don't like ourselves either.
Don't have 15 minutes? I don't believe you!
Today we give our 15 minutes on the classic, Tango & Cash.1989 ‧ Comedy/Buddy cop ‧ 1h 44m
Police officers Ray Tango (Sylvester Stallone) and Gabe Cash (Kurt Russell) are narcotics experts working to bring down drug lord Yves Perret (Jack Palance). In an attempt to stymie their efforts, Perret sets up Tango and Cash, making it look as if they've killed an FBI agent. Arrested and put in prison, the two cops formulate an escape plan and, once out, team up with Tango's exotic dancer sister, Katherine (Teri Hatcher), in order to clear their records and take down Perret once and for all.
#SylvesterStallone #Amazon #Tango&Cash #ShortPodcast #Podcast #Review________________________________________________Site: http://SimplisticReviews.netTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@simplisticreviewsiTunes: https://goo.gl/orhsR4Spotify: https://goo.gl/pcBg5VTwitter: https://twitter.com/simpletweetersFacebook: http://facebook.com/SimplisticReviews Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/simplygramming
Tuesday Jun 01, 2021
Tuesday Jun 01, 2021
Yo June! On this latest edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast, the boys discuss everything from Woody Allen to Woody from Toy Story...from Henry Golding to Henry Cavill...from Willy Wonka to Big Willy Smith. All that, several Real American jibes at the classic GI Joe animated series and underhanded jokes at Steven Seagal's expense on episode 160 of the Simplistic Reviews podcast.
AND...If you want to sing along to the opening song, here are DJ's alternative lyrics to the G.I. Joe theme:
DJ's Alternative Lyrics To The G.I. Joe Theme Song
Crashing through the skies,
comes a fearful cry.
Cobra! x2
(CHORUS OVERLAPPING)
Cobra! x2
Armies Of the night,
Evil taking flight.
Cobra! x2
(CHORUS OVERLAPPING)
Cobra!
Ow! My throat!
Nowhere to run,
Nowhere to hide!
Panic spreading far and wide,
Who can turn the tide?
(CHORUS)
G.I. Joe!
A real American hero,
G.I. Joe is there!
G.I. Joe!
A real American hero,
They cause their share of damage, to be fair!
Fighting for freedom wherever there's trouble,
And causing mayhem!
We put alarming faith in them!
Can the world oppose,
Deadliest of foes.
Cobra! x2
(CHORUS OVERLAPPING)
I'm coughing blood!
This really hurts!
Joes will risk it all,
To end the evil call of,
Cobra! x2
(CHORUS OVERLAPPING WITH COUGH)
They never give up,
They never say die.
Walking tall with banners high,
They sound the battle cry!
(ALPINE OVERLAPPING)
Leroy Jenkins!
(CHORUS)
G.I. Joe!
A real American hero,
G.I. Joe resists!
G.I. Joe!
A real American hero,
Your government's funding this!
Fighting for freedom wherever there's trouble,
Over land and sea and air!
They're why we cut your Medicare!
(NARRATOR)
G.I. Joe is the code name for American's daring, highly trained special mission force. Even though they consist of half-dressed karate experts, Native Americans with attack eagles, and guys really committed to sports motifs. Their purpose? To defend us from Cobra. A ruthless terrorist organization with really good branding. I mean, I wouldn't wear an al Qaeda t-shirt, but I'd rock the hell out of that Cobra logo.
(CHORUS)
G.I. Joe!
A real American hero,
Although many are foreign!
G.I. Joe!
A real American hero,
Seriously, check their origins!
Fighting for freedom wherever there's trouble,
They're one hell of a team!
A jingoistic wet dream!
(COBRA COMMANDER OVERLAPPING)
Cobra! I can't see shit in this goddamn mask!
(CHORUS)
G.I. Joe!
A real American hero,
One guy has a talking bird!
G.I. Joe!
Thursday May 20, 2021
Thursday May 20, 2021
Marked For Death | 1990 ‧ Action ‧ 1h 33m
A retired DEA agent is out to hunt down and take out a Jamaican drug posse that has targeted he and his family for murder. (From IMDB)
For some odd reason this is our 3rd Steven Seagal movie. And this one comes with bad Jamaican accents from both the actors and us. It's got a good kill count so we have that going for us.
Hard To Kill - https://youtu.be/oeVNLP2MRJg
Fire Down Below - https://youtu.be/SkdPZRedbpg
Site: http://SimplisticReviews.net
Spotify: https://goo.gl/pcBg5V
Twitter: https://twitter.com/simpletweeters
Facebook: http://facebook.com/SimplisticReviews
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/simplygramming
iTunes: https://goo.gl/orhsR4
#Movie #Commentary #MarkedforDeath #StevenSeagal #Podcast
Saturday May 15, 2021
Saturday May 15, 2021
Don't have 15 minutes? I don't believe you!
Today we give our 15 minutes on the new Amazon Prime series, Invincible.
Seventeen-year-old Mark Grayson is just like every guy his age, except that his father is Omni-Man, the most powerful superhero on the planet. As Mark develops powers of his own, he discovers his father's legacy may not be as heroic as it seems.
#Comics #Amazon #Invincible #ShortPodcast #Podcast #Review
________________________________________________Site: http://SimplisticReviews.netTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@simplisticreviewsiTunes: https://goo.gl/orhsR4Spotify: https://goo.gl/pcBg5VTwitter: https://twitter.com/simpletweetersFacebook: http://facebook.com/SimplisticReviews Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/simplygramming
Saturday May 01, 2021
Saturday May 01, 2021
On this May Day edition of the Simplistic Reviews podcast, the boys swoon over Tony Scott films, James Spader, the Captain America trilogy, and Artemis Fowl. One of those things aren't true. You'll have to listen to find out which and to hear a lot more on the latest episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast.
Tuesday Apr 20, 2021
Tuesday Apr 20, 2021
(This version has audio of the movie. We have another version without movie audio as well)
China O'Brien | 1989 ‧ Action ‧ 1h 30m
A police woman, expert and instructor in martial arts, leaves the city to stay with her dad, sheriff in a town with peace and quiet - or so she thinks. She gets plenty opportunities to show her martial arts skills. (From IMDB)
China O'Brien was one of the hardest movies to find, yet one of the best movies we ever watched...we'll in terms of fighting since the acting and story is nothing much to write home about. But damn those fight scenes are amazing. We can only hope the sequel lives up or excels in the fighting category.
Since this film is so hard to find we will upload some fighting scenes for you to see on our YouTube channel. Also, in our video version of this podcast you'll see a few fights appear as we watch.
Grab that popcorn, hold on to your peg of a hand and long live our Queen, Cynthia Rothrock! One of the best action stars...ever!
#Movie #Commentary #China #Podcast
Tuesday Apr 20, 2021
Tuesday Apr 20, 2021
(This version has no audio of the movie. We have another version with movie audio as well)
China O'Brien | 1989 ‧ Action ‧ 1h 30m
A police woman, expert and instructor in martial arts, leaves the city to stay with her dad, sheriff in a town with peace and quiet - or so she thinks. She gets plenty opportunities to show her martial arts skills. (From IMDB)
China O'Brien was one of the hardest movies to find, yet one of the best movies we ever watched...we'll in terms of fighting since the acting and story is nothing much to write home about. But damn those fight scenes are amazing. We can only hope the sequel lives up or excels in the fighting category.
Since this film is so hard to find we will upload some fighting scenes for you to see on our YouTube channel. Also, in our video version of this podcast you'll see a few fights appear as we watch.
Grab that popcorn, hold on to your peg of a hand and long live our Queen, Cynthia Rothrock! One of the best action stars...ever!
#Movie #Commentary #China #Podcast
Thursday Apr 15, 2021
Thursday Apr 15, 2021
Is it that time of the month already? Yes it is! So here is our 15 minute podcast...let's get to it!
In episode 2 the gang gives their one word review of Godzilla vs Kong.
Don't have 15 minutes? I don't believe you!
#Godzilla #KingKong #GodzillavsKong #ShortPodcast #Podcast #Review
________________________________________________Site: http://SimplisticReviews.net
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@simplisticreviews
iTunes: https://goo.gl/orhsR4
Spotify: https://goo.gl/pcBg5V
Twitter: https://twitter.com/simpletweeters
Facebook: http://facebook.com/SimplisticReviews
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/simplygramming
Thursday Apr 01, 2021
Thursday Apr 01, 2021
On the April Edition of the Simplistic Reviews podcast, the boys explain their disgust for Easter candy, Matthew comes up with a new invention that'll make billions, a special guest priest hear their sins for Simplistic Confessional, and torpedoes are away in another game of Simplistic Submarine. All that and a bunny dies...just kidding...or am I? (Ahem) All that and more on this episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast.