Happy 4th Of July. The boys at Simplistic Reviews, along with Greg Cafaro from Miscast Entertainment, are ready to light all the fireworks your parents told you were dangerous. First things first, we celebrate Matt's copper anniversary, then we peek in on the life of Chris Hansen, bring back a classic segment called Simply The Best, do a little channel surfing with some TV Roundup, share another entry into Julie's Diary, and then flip the script with another edition of Simplistic Switcheroo. All that and more on this explosive episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast.

On this episode we head down to Georgia, figuratively, and I chat with Nate Grabowski, the Tennessee Market Manager from Monday Night Brewing Co. in Atlanta

Nate and I go back about three years so we wax on our old gigs, where we are now, how it's going, and where we think we're heading. Oh, and we got to hang out in person in the studio sharing a few beers while staying socially distant of course!

Remember to keep supporting your local bars, restaurants, breweries and distilleries in these CRAZY COVID TIMES.

If you want to yell at Matt about his interviewing skills, or lack thereof, e-mail him at matt@simplisticreviews.net or if you want to leave a general comment or maybe even want to throw your two-cents onto the show, e-mail contact@simplisticreviews.net.

On this episode of ‘Beyond the Pale Ale’ I’m joined by the dynamic duo of Joaquin and Josh Peña from Islla Street Brewing Co. in San Antonio, Texas.

In this Jumbo-Deluxe episode, we dive into the the diversity of the Texas beer scene, how a culinary director and oil field chemist created a brewery that bridges cultures together, and how Covid-19 has changed the landscape of business as we know it.

Remember to keep supporting your local bars, restaurants, breweries and distilleries in these CRAZY COVID TIMES.

If you want to yell at Matt about his interviewing skills, or lack thereof, e-mail him at matt@simplisticreviews.net or if you want to leave a general comment or maybe even want to throw your two-cents onto the show, e-mail contact@simplisticreviews.net

On this episode of "Beyond the Pale Ale" I'm joined by one of my best friends in the beer business, Adam Crumley, the New Belgium Tennessee Voodoo Ranger himself!

This is also the first LIVE interview I conduct, but don't worry we were doing respectful of social distancing rules and regulations.

Adam chats about the state of affairs on New Belgium while we enjoy some new products from their Voodoo Ranger line and pop a cork on a special beer while looking forward to the future of business.

 

 

Remember to keep supporting your local bars, restaurants, breweries and distilleries in these tough and emotional times.

 

If you want to yell at Matt about his interviewing skills, or lack thereof, e-mail him at matt@simplisticreviews.net or if you want to leave a general comment or maybe even want to throw your two-cents onto the show, e-mail contact@simplisticreviews.net

Show Notes

New Belgium Brewing

 

On this week's episode of 'Beyond the Pale Ale' I'm fortunate enough to be joined by Co-Founder and Head Brewer, Marcus Baskerville, from Weathered Souls Brewing Co. in San Antonio, TX.

We chat about their business model during the Covid-19 Pandemic, his journey from Sacramento to San Antonio, diversity in the beer industry, and of course about their 'Black is Beautiful' beer project.

With over 200 breweries across 35 states already involved in 'Black is Beautiful,' be on the lookout for this beer very soon, and make sure you listen, learn, collaborate, and work with local businesses to help spread the word on social injustice and how to fix systematic racism across the world.

Remember to keep supporting your local bars, restaurants, breweries and distilleries in these tough and emotional times.

If you want to yell at Matt about his interviewing skills, or lack thereof, e-mail him at matt@simplisticreviews.net or if you want to leave a general comment or maybe even want to throw your two-cents onto the show, e-mail contact@simplisticreviews.net

Show Notes

Black is Beautiful Project

Weathered Souls Brewing Co.

Know Your Rights Camp

The return of a very special guest, the return of one of our favorite games, a brand new segment, two new sketches, and an in-depth look at Joey Pants' pants. This episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast couldn't be any more filled to the brim with crazy if were a Gary Busey biography. We are graced with the presence of Jeanette Ward from The Mundane Adventures Of A Fangirl. We also test her film recognition with a little game of Simplistic Titles. Julie gets her own new segment aptly named Julie's Diary. And to top it all off, Jay Cluitt from Life Vs Film makes a cameo in order to channel the spirit of Christopher Nolan right in time for Tenet. Sounds weird? It is! Cool right? All that and more on a special episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast

 

 
 
 
 

Things are starting to heat up with this episode of 'Beyond the Pale Ale.'

Matt gets a chance to catch up with Dylan Crain from Memphis' Finest, Crosstown Brewing Co.

Remember to keep supporting your local bars, restaurants, breweries and distilleries in these CRAZY COVID TIMES.

 

If you want to yell at Matt about his interviewing skills, or lack thereof, e-mail him at matt@simplisticreviews.net or if you want to leave a general comment or maybe even want to throw your two-cents onto the show, e-mail contact@simplisticreviews.net

 

Show Notes

Crosstown Brewing Co.

All Together Collab

In this episode of "Beyond the Pale Ale" Matt chats with Stephanie Davis from Wicked Weed Brewing in Asheville, North Carolina.

Stephanie takes care of the entire state of Tennessee offering the latest and greatest from one of Asheville's most popular breweries.

Steph and Matt also go over new releases and the Beers That Build program.

Remember to keep supporting your local bars, restaurants, breweries and distilleries in these CRAZY COVID TIMES.

If you want to yell at Matt about his interviewing skills, or lack thereof, e-mail him at matt@simplisticreviews.net or if you want to leave a general comment or maybe even want to throw your two-cents onto the show, e-mail contact@simplisticreviews.net

Show Notes

Giving Back to Asheville

Donating to the Cause

Beers That Build

Beyond Skline

R ‧ 2017 ‧ Sci-fi/Action ‧ 1h 45m
Detective Mark Corley storms his way onto an alien spaceship to rescue his estranged son. When the ship crashes in Southeast Asia, he forges an alliance with a band of survivors to take back the planet once and for all.

The quarantine Netflix Party Edition continues with the classic 2017 sci-fi film, Beyond Skyline.

Oh it's not a classic?

I just assumed a movie about a father and aliens or a baby or something...wait I forget...what the hell did we just watch? Seriously, if you pulled a gun out and asked me to name one character, just one, you would be pulling that trigger.

Well, maybe letting you choice these movies is too much power, I'm honestly starting to think about taking my chances by leaving the house than watching another one of those "classic" Netflix films.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Podcast:

iTunes: https://goo.gl/orhsR4

Spotify: https://goo.gl/pcBg5V

Site: http://SimplisticReviews.net

Twitter: https://twitter.com/simpletweeters

Facebook: http://facebook.com/SimplisticReviews

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/simplygramming

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On this episode of Beyond the Pale Ale, I chat with Adam Kamerer from Blackstone Brewing Co. in Nashville, Tennessee.

 

Being Nashville’s oldest brewery, Blackstone has been the ebbs and flows of a city that has grown at an exponential rate, and only to see what damage the recent pandemic has caused Nashville.

 

Remember to keep supporting your local bars, restaurants, breweries and distilleries in these CRAZY COVID TIMES.

 

If you want to yell at Matt about his interviewing skills, or lack thereof, e-mail him at matt@simplisticreviews.net or if you want to leave a general comment or maybe even want to throw your two-cents onto the show, e-mail contact@simplisticreviews.net

 

Show Notes

 

Blackstone on Facebook

 

Blackstone on Instagram

 

Nashville Brewing Co on Instagram

 

In the inaugural episode of Beyond the Pale Ale, Matt sits down with Isaiah Kallman, from Black Abbey Brewing Co in Nashville, TN.

Discussion ranges from the difference between Michi-ganders and Miami-ans, and how Isaiah might actually be connected to royalty and own an actual castle!

Remember to keep supporting your local bars, restaurants, breweries and distilleries in these CRAZY COVID TIMES.

If you want to yell at Matt about his interviewing skills, or lack thereof, e-mail him at matt@simplisticreviews.net or if you want to leave a general comment or maybe even want to throw your two-cents onto the show, e-mail contact@simplisticreviews.net

SHOW NOTES

Black Abbey Brewing Co.

Dad Rock Block

 

Big thanks to Greg and Will from MISCAST and everyone else for joining!

 

Listeners picked it, so we watched it...

 

Shark Night 3D...

 

Yippy.

 

 

 

Shark Night

 

PG-13 ‧ 2011 ‧ Horror/Thriller

Newly arrived at her family's lake-island cabin, college student Sara (Sara Paxton) and her friends prepare for a weekend of fun in the sun. But soon after they dive into the lake, football player Malik (Sinqua Walls) stumbles out of the water with a grievous wound. Thinking Malik is the victim of a freak accident, the friends pile into a tiny speedboat and head for the hospital. To their horror, they discover that they are surrounded by hundreds of massive, hungry sharks.

 

Release date: September 2, 2011 (USA)
Director: David R. Ellis
Budget: 28 million USD
Box office: 40.1 million USD

 

 

Still have that face mask by your side? Great! Wash those hands again because they're about to get bloody in this week's Netflix Party.

Big thanks to Greg and Will from MISCAST and everyone else for joining!

This time around we watched...

 

 

Bloodsport

1988 ‧ Action/Martial Arts

U.S. soldier Frank Dux (Jean-Claude Van Damme) has come to Hong Kong to be accepted into the Kumite, a highly secret and extremely violent martial-arts competition. While trying to gain access into the underground world of clandestine fighters, he also has to avoid military officers who consider him to be AWOL. After enduring a difficult training and beginning a romance with journalist Janice Kent (Leah Ayres), Frank is given the opportunity to fight. But can he survive?

Release date: February 26, 1988 (USA)

Director: Newt Arnold

Box office: 65 million USD

 

 

With a world starved for content, the Simplistic Reviews Podcast is here to show you how low the bar has fallen. With the help of Jay Cluitt from Life Vs Film, Jeanette Ward from The Mundane Adventures of a Fangirl, Nicholas Rehak, Steven C. Phillips from Altered Geek, and Todd Liebenow from Forgotten Films, Simplistic Reviews presents their two-part exposé on Sesame Street. The fellas also discuss which movies are to die for if ever the theaters open back up. And we top it all off with a game in which choices will have to be made on which fictional character is allowed to marry Justin and Matt's daughters. All that and more on this untested and very sick episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

Cowabunga!

Remember when Mom would say, "Stop playing with those damn turtle action figures, get out of the house and go play outside!?"

Boy times have changed...

Since we cannot play outside we decided to get together with our fellow podcasters and listeners, our friends, and watch 1990s classic Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles online with the Netflix Party Extension.

So grab that facemask, wash those hands and join us during the quarantine.

Big thanks to Freddy and Greg from MISCAST for joining!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

In New York, mysterious radioactive ooze has mutated four sewer turtles into talking, upright-walking, crime-fighting ninjas. The intrepid heroes -- Michelangelo (Robbie Rist), Donatello (Corey Feldman), Raphael (Josh Pais) and Leonardo (Brian Tochi) -- are trained in the Ninjutsu arts by their rat sensei, Splinter. When a villainous rogue ninja, who is a former pupil of Splinter, arrives and spreads lawlessness throughout the city, it's up to the plucky turtles to stop him.

Release date: March 30, 1990 (USA)
Director: Steve Barron
Box office: 202 million USD

While everyone is sitting home doing nothing, we decided to watch a movie that went nowhere except to maximum complete and utter nonsense...enjoy! :)

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is MV5BZjAyM2U0MzItNWI5Yi00YTA4LWEyZjUtZjMyYTUwYTUwNzk3XkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMjUyNDk2ODc@._V1_-1024x439.jpg

Our Man Flint
 1966 ‧ Action/Comedy ‧ 1h 48m

When a global criminal organization flexes its power over weather and tectonic activity, secret agent Derek Flint (James Coburn) is summoned from retirement to get to the bottom of the matter. While he mulls over whether to take the assignment, he narrowly escapes an assassination attempt, but his spy agency commander, Cramden (Lee J. Cobb), is nearly mortally wounded. Vowing to take the fight to the enemy, Flint treks through Europe hot on the trail of femme fatale spy Gila (Gila Golan).


Release date: January 16, 1966 (USA)


Director: Daniel Mann


Music composed by: Jerry Goldsmith


Screenplay: Hal Fimberg, Ben Starr

ourmanflint-1024x446.jpg

Stuck at home hiding from the Corona Virus? Watch some TV. Can't afford cable because you lost your job? Read a book. Suffering from illiteracy? Play with your kids. Hate your family? Well, there is always the Simplistic Reviews Podcast. This month the boys try to socially distance themselves from Harvey Weinstein, Kid Rock, Judith Light, Buzz Lightyear and even the wonderful world of Disney. They also debut a new segment in which they point out some Hollywood tropes they're sick of. All that and more, without the requirement of a breathing mask, on this episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast

As the month of love and black history comes to a close, the Simplistic Reviews podcast does their best to hate on the concept of love and misremember pretty much all of black history. The boys tackle everything from Batman, to Bond songs, to Rick Moranis. They also introduce a new “Where Are They Now?” styled segment we’re calling What Happened. All that, a brief phone call to Michael Fassbender, a cameo from Walter Vinci from the First Time Watchers Podcast, a Terry Funk For President ad campaign and a pretty long and slightly unintentional plug for the app Cameo on this February episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast

Theft, Trespassing, Kidnapping, Murder, Intrigue, Joel Kinnaman...that's right...Joel Kinnaman. The first Simplistic Reviews Podcast of the new year brings you all that and more, including Simon Appleton from The Movie Moustache. We discuss everything from Bond to Batman to Batman's odd confession in Batman Forever to Harvey Dent. Tune in and listen to all our crimes against the entertainment community.

 

 

While we are in the midst of 8 crazy nights and the Christmas season, why not get yourself put on the naughty list by checking out the holiday episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast. The boys end the year off right by checking what tantalizing entertainment news story is stuffed in their stockings, they recap the year, and then finally decide which movies are actual Christmas movies and which aren’t movies at all in another installment of Simplistic Titles. All that and more on this gift wrapped episode of the Simplistic Reviews podcast

 

NOTES

FIRSTTIMEWATCHERS

MOVIE MOUSTACHE

LIFE VS FILM

TIM ALLEN: SNITCH

JUICE

 

From everyone at Simplistic Review, Merry Christmas you filthy animal!

 

Movie Commentary: Christmas Evil - 1980

Comical festive frights. A toy-maker who revels in the Christmas spirit suffers a mental break when his work is met with hypocrisy and cynicism and goes on a yuletide killing spree.

Stuffed from all that turkey? Any room for dessert?

Bet you feel like crap right now. Want to feel worse? If so we have two terrible movies for you, a leg or thigh double feature!

Watch what you can stomach or skip this one, because to be honest both are not horrible films...sorry.

 

Mr. No Legs:1h 30min |1978| Action - A physically challenged mob enforcer uses his martial-arts skills and a specially equipped wheelchair to keep the police and his enemies at bay.

 

ThanksKilling: 1h 10min | 2008 | Comedy, Horror - A possessed turkey terrorizes five college students during Thanksgiving break.

 

 

On this Halloween Edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast, DJ finally gives his thoughts on the recent MCU criticism...Matthew creates a new catchphrase that is as bewildering as it is hilarious...and Justin cries...yup...he's not that dead inside after all. All that and more on a scarily good episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

When general Mitchell's daughter joins South American rebels, he asks two of his ex-soldiers, Becker and Kelly, to get her back. They soon discovers that the rebels are in league with Russians.

Rambo is back in the theaters so what better way to celebrate then with a film that has no connection with the series. In fact it's not even nearly close to the worst Rambo film. Because no one asked for it, Jungle Assault! Rambo is back in the theaters so what better way to celebrate then with a film that has no connection with the series. In fact it's not even nearly close to the worst Rambo film. Because no one asked for it, Jungle Assault!

A David A. Prior made film on a budget slightly less then a family going to their local grocery store.

 

On this back to school episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast. William Davis Moore, from Miscast Entertainment, sits in for the vacationing Matthew Stewart. The boys discuss...well...The Boys...TV series...they also briefly discuss the only Oscar-winning film to have a money shot in it (Can you guess what it is?)...they tackle the TransAtlantic accent and finally reveal the real person behind Warner Brothers. All That and Moore...see what I did there? Because William Davis Moore is on the...nevermind...All that and some stoking of the flames surrounding that old rumor about William Shatner's late wife...yeah we went there...on the August Edition of the Simplistic Review Podcast.

NOTES

Shatner's Wife

The Boys Airplane Scene

The TransAtlantic Accent

Pennyworth

Lobo on Krypton

Lex Luthor Stole 40 Cakes

 

Stone Cold

1991 ‧ Thriller/Action ‧ 1h 35m

A street-smart cop goes undercover to infiltrate and bring to justice a ruthless motorcycle gang before they can carry out their plans of tyranny and murder.

stone_cold_ES00005_C.jpg  MGM...oh MGM. Your copyright happy trigger finger was at it again. Nothing like editing Stone Cold a few times only to have you take it down again and again. Fun stuff MGM...fun stuff.

Take a journey with DJ and Justin to a simpler time, were MGM made fun and exciting movies existed. Sure, MGM has lost it ways these days but there was a time they made enjoyable films. No, I'm not salty over the pull downs - but Stone Cold is a fun ride. And lets not pull punches here, no one pulls off the business in the front and party in the back like Brian mother F-ing Bosworth!

So, take a ride with us as we watch 90s Stone Cold and now faith-based action star, The Boz!

Yeah, the guy from Stone Cold does faith based action movies now, hey everyone has to make a living. 

 

Stone Cold

1991 ‧ Thriller/Action ‧ 1h 35m

A street-smart cop goes undercover to infiltrate and bring to justice a ruthless motorcycle gang before they can carry out their plans of tyranny and murder.

stone_cold_ES00005_C.jpg  MGM...oh MGM. Your copyright happy trigger finger was at it again. Nothing like editing Stone Cold a few times only to have you take it down again and again. Fun stuff MGM...fun stuff.

Take a journey with DJ and Justin to a simpler time, were MGM made fun and exciting movies existed. Sure, MGM has lost it ways these days but there was a time they made enjoyable films. No, I'm not salty over the pull downs - but Stone Cold is a fun ride. And lets not pull punches here, no one pulls off the business in the front and party in the back like Brian mother F-ing Bosworth!

So, take a ride with us as we watch 90s Stone Cold and now faith-based action star, The Boz!

Yeah, the guy from Stone Cold does faith based action movies now, hey everyone has to make a living. 

 

Happy Fourth Of July! A holiday you that’s best with the fireworks that only the Simplistic Reviews Podcast can give you. On this return episode, the boys discuss what they did on their summer break, which includes hospital visits that lead to an interaction with Michael Keaton, their top 3 episodes of Black Mirror, some of Quincy Jones’ best hits…on fellow celebrities, and how much they would need to get paid to let a female soccer player kick them in the nethers. And to top it off, they play the explosive game Simplistic Submarine. All that and more on this comeback episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast 

MUSIC 
Fast Times By IDOLS 
Gold Medal By Sounds Like Sander 
Variety Time By Tim Garland 

NOTES 
Alex Morgan 

Quincy Jones Rumor About Brando

Black Mirror

On this Simplistic Interview, we sit down with Heather Buckley, producer of the 2018 horror film "The Ranger."

From days writing at Fangoria Magazine to pitching films at Cannes and South by Southwest, Matt and Heather discuss what it was that got her into horror, how inclusion is shaping the horror genre, and essentially how she is an encyclopedia of genre knowledge. Oh, and of course punk rock!

Follow her all over social media too!

Twitter: @_HeatherBuckley

Instagram: www.instagram.com/_heatherbuckley

And of course check out "The Ranger!"

Twitter: @TheRangerMovie

Instagram: @therangermovie

Streaming on Shudder, Amazon Prime, and anywhere else where you can find great horror flicks.

We started this new year off with a film from 90's action star and serial eater, Steven Seagal's Hard to Kill! We continue the Seagal Saga with Fire Down Below, you know the EPA action film...no not that one...the other one...yeah there is another EPA action film.

Fire Down Below
R

 1997 ‧ Thriller/Action ‧ 1h 45m

Description

When an EPA representative is discovered dead in a small Midwestern town, government agent Jack Taggart (Steven Seagal) goes undercover to check things out. He finds that local coal mogul Orin Hanner Sr. (Kris Kristofferson) is cutting financial corners by disposing of hazardous waste wherever he pleases and that local kids are falling ill because of this recklessness. Taggart then works to stop the shady activity and save the town, but Hanner and his thugs soon grow suspicious of him.

Initial release: December 13, 1997 (South Korea)
Budget: 42 million USD
Box office: 16.2 million USD
Music composed by: Nick Glennie-Smith

We started this new year off with a film from 90's action star and serial eater, Steven Seagal's Hard to Kill! We continue the Seagal Saga with Fire Down Below, you know the EPA action film...no not that one...the other one...yeah there is another EPA action film.

Fire Down Below
R

 1997 ‧ Thriller/Action ‧ 1h 45m

Description

When an EPA representative is discovered dead in a small Midwestern town, government agent Jack Taggart (Steven Seagal) goes undercover to check things out. He finds that local coal mogul Orin Hanner Sr. (Kris Kristofferson) is cutting financial corners by disposing of hazardous waste wherever he pleases and that local kids are falling ill because of this recklessness. Taggart then works to stop the shady activity and save the town, but Hanner and his thugs soon grow suspicious of him.

Initial release: December 13, 1997 (South Korea)
Budget: 42 million USD
Box office: 16.2 million USD
Music composed by: Nick Glennie-Smith

Matt sits down with Cody Meirick, Director and Producer of the new documentary Scary Stories.

Find out more about Scary Stories:
Scarystoriesdoc.com
bit.ly/WatchScaryStories
Facebook.com/scarystoriesmovie
Twitter.com/scarystoriesdoc
Instagram.com/scarystoriesdoc

April 26 is here!

Sure, the mystery movie commentaries were fun. But you knew what you wanted and we knew what you needed. So today we give it like it has never been given...That is why, for no other reason, April 26 was circled on our calendars.

A date we know a lot of you have been counting down towards.

A date that will most likely go down in movie history.

April 26, 2019.

The date Simplistic Reviews finally watched...Guns!

Guns.png

Guns
1990 ‧ Thriller/Drama ‧ 1h 36m

Description

Initial release: November 9, 1990
Director: Andy Sidaris
 

A South American gunrunner (Erik Estrada) uses an island in Hawaii as his base of operations. A squad of beautiful government airfreighters Donna (Dona Speir) and Nicole (Roberta Vasquez) agents is sent to put him out of business.

Shit yeah! Andy Sidaris! The Sidaris Cinematic Universe continues of the greatest movie series ever! Bombs! Bullets and Babes! This isn't no children's Endgame, this is real shit!

 
 
 
 
April 26 is here!

Sure, the mystery movie commentaries were fun. But you knew what you wanted and we knew what you needed. So today we give it like it has never been given...That is why, for no other reason, April 26 was circled on our calendars.

A date we know a lot of you have been counting down towards.

A date that will most likely go down in movie history.

April 26, 2019.

The date Simplistic Reviews finally watched...Guns!

Guns.png

Guns
1990 ‧ Thriller/Drama ‧ 1h 36m

Description

Initial release: November 9, 1990
Director: Andy Sidaris
 

A South American gunrunner (Erik Estrada) uses an island in Hawaii as his base of operations. A squad of beautiful government airfreighters Donna (Dona Speir) and Nicole (Roberta Vasquez) agents is sent to put him out of business.

Shit yeah! Andy Sidaris! The Sidaris Cinematic Universe continues of the greatest movie series ever! Bombs! Bullets and Babes! This isn't no children's Endgame, this is real shit!

 
 
 
 

 

 The Simplistic Reviews Podcast is back from Spring break...clean...sober...and ready to go. One of those things are true. The boys discuss everything they missed since they’ve been gone. From James Gunn rehiring, to the etymology of the word “trump”, to that famous last line in Lethal Weapon 2. You remember that one right? We sure didn’t. Doug Funny, Oregon Trail, Jenny & Melissa McCarthy...all points of interest or disinterest on this Spring fling episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast. 

 

MUSIC

Fast Times Club By IDOL

Gold Medal By Sounds Like Sander

Kazam%2BmMC.jpg

So last time we tried something new, something mysterious, something crazy!

The people responded and wanted more or we're just untalented hacks...anyway we did it again!

Matt and Justin watch a movie just in-time for another movie that's due out April 5. Wow a movie commentary tie-in? Kinda...But unlike last time, both Matt and Justin have seen this film before.

Sure, it may be just a one off type of film but damn its really mysterious is it not?

So join Matt as he joins DJ in a movie commentary like none other...a mystery movie...eh movie commentary!?

Kazam%2BmMC.jpg

So last time we tried something new, something mysterious, something crazy!

The people responded and wanted more or we're just untalented hacks...anyway we did it again!

Matt and Justin watch a movie just in-time for another movie that's due out April 5. Wow a movie commentary tie-in? Kinda...But unlike last time, both Matt and Justin have seen this film before.

Sure, it may be just a one off type of film but damn its really mysterious is it not?

So join Matt as he joins DJ in a movie commentary like none other...a mystery movie...eh movie commentary!?

mystery%2Bmovie.png

Today we try something new, something mysterious, something crazy! DJ and Justin watch a movie like they did so many times before. But this time it's different. This time Justin carefully selected from the Simplistic Reviews ever growing library of shitty movies, a film DJ has never seen nor heard of.

And that's not all. This time DJ has no idea what he will be watching, he knows nothing, just like you!

So join DJ as he is only aware of recording a movie commentary...not what movie...but...a mystery movie!

 

 

 

February is not only the month of love. It is also the month in which the hooligans from the Simplistic Reviews Podcast return! On this season premiere episode, the boys have intellectual discussions/ profanity-laced tangents about Liam Neeson’s past, America’s rampant use of blackface, Benedict Cumberbatch‘s most creepy role, Jeff Goldblum (AGAIN), and Albert Finney’s best role...Dr. Albert Hirsch in the Bourne Ultimatum...it’s subjective.

 

All that and more on this heartwarming and romantic February episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

NOTES

 

 

MUSIC

Fast Times Club By IDOL

Gold Medal By Sounds Like Sander

Kelly%2Blebrock.jpgThe new year is here and so is a new batch of Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentaries! 

We start this new year off with a film from 90's action star and serial eater, Steven Seagal. Which Seagal film? Well, since Steven has a large collection of so bad its good, we figured we get out one of the better Seagal films that also has some of our favorite lines.

Stay warm with the boys from SR on this chilly January Sunday and let's watch some Hard to Kill!

 

Hard to Kill
1990 ‧ Drama/Thriller ‧ 1h 40m
Hard%2Bto%2Bkill.jpg

When police detective Mason Storm (Steven Seagal) uncovers ties among corrupt cops, the mob and charismatic politician Vernon Trent (Bill Sadler), a hit is ordered on his family. During the attack, Storm's wife is killed, and the cop himself is severely injured. After waking up from a years-long coma, Storm, aided by gorgeous nurse Andy Stewart (Kelly LeBrock), slowly gets back on his feet and plots revenge against those who wronged him, particularly the duplicitous Sen. Trent.

 

Release date: February 9, 1990 (USA)

Director: Bruce Malmuth
Box office: 47.4 million USD
Screenplay: Steven McKay
Music composed by: David Michael Frank
 
 

 

 

Kelly%2Blebrock.jpgThe new year is here and so is a new batch of Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentaries! 

We start this new year off with a film from 90's action star and serial eater, Steven Seagal. Which Seagal film? Well, since Steven has a large collection of so bad its good, we figured we get out one of the better Seagal films that also has some of our favorite lines.

Stay warm with the boys from SR on this chilly January Sunday and let's watch some Hard to Kill!

 

Hard to Kill
1990 ‧ Drama/Thriller ‧ 1h 40m
Hard%2Bto%2Bkill.jpg

When police detective Mason Storm (Steven Seagal) uncovers ties among corrupt cops, the mob and charismatic politician Vernon Trent (Bill Sadler), a hit is ordered on his family. During the attack, Storm's wife is killed, and the cop himself is severely injured. After waking up from a years-long coma, Storm, aided by gorgeous nurse Andy Stewart (Kelly LeBrock), slowly gets back on his feet and plots revenge against those who wronged him, particularly the duplicitous Sen. Trent.

Release date: February 9, 1990 (USA)
Director: Bruce Malmuth
Box office: 47.4 million USD
Screenplay: Steven McKay
Music composed by: David Michael Frank
 
 

 

 

Happy Holidays to all, and to all a good podcast! The Simplistic Reviews Podcast is back to jingle some bells and deck some halls with Simon Appleton from Moustache Movie News. We ask the expert in all things U.K. everything from Brexit, the metric system, and Meghan Markel...we also take a break to read some Christmas cards sent to Santa, much to the chagrin of our Jewish cohost Matthew Stewart. We also bring back one of our favorite games, Simplistic Titles, to see if Simon knows what movies are real and which ones come from the dark recesses of DJ Valentine's twisted mind. All that reindeer crap and more on a fa-la-la-la-loaded episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast

 

MUSIC

Deck The Halls By Album House

Hark The Herald Angels Sing By Album House

Jingle Bells By Album House

O Little Town Of Bethlehem By Album House

We Wish You An Indie Christmas By Aaron Tosti

Happy Christmas Deck The Halls By Be Still The Earth

8-Bit Blues By Fairlight

Move By OBOY

 

NOTES

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Audition

Aladdin First Look

Lindsey Lohan Beach Club

December 17, 2018

Simplistic Reviews: Aquaman

Today we try something new. DJ and Justin sit down and talk about what they liked, didn't like and what should of been.

This is Simplistic Reviews on Aquaman.

Aquaman
PG-13

2018 ‧ Fantasy/Science Fiction ‧ 2h 22m

 
Once home to the most advanced civilization on Earth, the city of Atlantis is now an underwater kingdom ruled by the power-hungry King Orm. With a vast army at his disposal, Orm plans to conquer the remaining oceanic people -- and then the surface world. Standing in his way is Aquaman, Orm's half-human, half-Atlantean brother and true heir to the throne. With help from royal counselor Vulko, Aquaman must retrieve the legendary Trident of Atlan and embrace his destiny as protector of the deep.
 
Release date: December 21, 2018 (USA)
Director: James Wan
 

Nov 2018

Don't count your turkeys before they're clucked...that's a saying, right? The Simplistic Reviews Podcast for November comes right under the wire just in time to tell you what happened to Harry Potter, explore the career and voice of Kathleen Turner, discuss the filmography of Steven Seagal and create a brand new Pokemon. The boys test the limits of reality with the return of Believable Or Bullshit. Justin reveals which classic '70s show he'll be watching next on TV Roundup. And we flip Hollywood on its head with another edition of Simplistic Switcheroo. All that and more on the award-winning Simplistic Reviews Podcast.


NOTES

Hard To Kill

HPV Michael Douglas

Detective Pikachu

Michael J. Fox on Curb

 

MUSIC

Fast Times By Idols

Sun Traces By Isaac Joel

Gold Medal By Sounds Like Sander

Runaway Ghost By Travis Loafman

If Looks Could Kill
PG-13 1991 ‧ Action/Action/Adventure ‧ 1h 28m
 
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Before he can graduate, cocky high school student Michael Corben (Richard Grieco) travels to France on a school trip to earn a missing French credit. But when a British intelligence agent mistakes Michael for a spy of the same name, they rush him to headquarters and assign him to capture the evil Augustus Steranko (Roger Rees), using a plethora of espionage gadgetry. Michael has the time of his life -- until he crosses paths with two assassins (Tom Rack, Carole Davis) who want him dead.
Initial release: March 15, 1991
Director: William Dear
 
 
Why? Because why not! Open that bottle of wine you keep thinking about and spend a lovely evening with DJ, Matt, Justin and the God that is Richard Grieco. Feast your eyes upon the Grieco and say goodbye to your family, because looks can kill!  
 

 

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If Looks Could Kill
PG-13 1991 ‧ Action/Action/Adventure ‧ 1h 28m
 
MOV_3b1bdc94_b.jpg

Before he can graduate, cocky high school student Michael Corben (Richard Grieco) travels to France on a school trip to earn a missing French credit. But when a British intelligence agent mistakes Michael for a spy of the same name, they rush him to headquarters and assign him to capture the evil Augustus Steranko (Roger Rees), using a plethora of espionage gadgetry. Michael has the time of his life -- until he crosses paths with two assassins (Tom Rack, Carole Davis) who want him dead.
Initial release: March 15, 1991
Director: William Dear
 
 
Why? Because why not! Open that bottle of wine you keep thinking about and spend a lovely evening with DJ, Matt, Justin and the God that is Richard Grieco. Feast your eyes upon the Grieco and say goodbye to your family, because looks can kill!  
 

 

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v1.jpg

 

 

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What could be more spooky then a Simplistic Reviews Spooktastic Podcast? Okay so you could just  turn on the news which is scary enough.

Today, we bring the Halloween to your ears on the 111th episode of... wait this episode is number 111? So I times 111 by 6... 666!!!, Oh my god Gregory Sestero its the mark of the beast! Damn that's perfect timing or we held off a movie commentary from being released to make a Halloween stupid joke. Nay...not us we aren't that cheesy.

So let's all indulge into some candy, laugh, drink and talk about news and some spooky thoughts we had recently as well make fun of those shitty Hollywood scumbags on this episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

Boooo!

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The guys from Simplistic Reviews sit around and talk news. Check out the Simplistic Reviews Podcast for good old family entertainment and Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary to have them over at your house.

Podcast:
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 The Simplistic Reviews Podcast is back from our August break and raring to go. And since we thought the show could use more of a fangirl touch, we got the biggest and best fangirl of them all, Jeanette Ward from The Mundane Adventures Of A Fangirl. And as gracious hosts, we immediately put Ms. Ward in the hot seat during another edition of Questions From The Crowd. The gang also go against their better nature while playing Say Anything. Shane Black, Cardi B Nicki Minaj Beef, and midichlorians...all things discussed on the latest episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

 

NOTES

Ray Liotta Commercial

Nicki Minaj & Cardi B Fight

Glass Noodles

Blockbuster Video 

 

MUSIC

60's Blues Rock Kinda Thing By Aaron Tosti

Gold Medal By Sounds Like Sander

Fast Times Club By Idols

(with Movie Audio)

Well it's not Samurai Cop...

 

Killing-American-Style-poster.jpgWelcome back to the Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary! Today we pop in another Amir Shervan film, Killing American Style. It's the 80's and of course Amir will recycle from his masterpiece Samurai Cop; location, music and beefy men with long beautiful hair.  The terrible acting mix with cheesy fight scene is the best part along with its nonexistent script. Killing American Style is no Samurai Cop. It's not as funny nor crazy but still a entertaining film except for one thing - rape. 

The amount of creepiness is beyond anything we have seen before. There really isn't a need for rape in a movie, especially when the story line doesn't call for it. A simple walk into the room with the door closing gets it point across, what we get here is out of control and unnecessary. Killing American Style is a fun Sunday film to drink and laugh at, just look at that title. But when your looking for another Samurai Cop don't look at Killing American Style, it's in a league of its own. 

 

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