(Ep. 44): Police Academy - Movie Commentary: April 2015

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES


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Today is movie commentary day! Today we watch the one and only Police Academy.

There isn't another movie in the likes of Police Academy. I mean how many movies include a human soundboard, extreme racism, a man in a horses ass and a surprise blow job to a 100 year old man (that could possibly be or not be by Steve Guttenberg).

Sounds like the perfect ingredients for the perfect film right? Well it is one of the funniest comedies ever made. So cue up that VHS copy of Police Academy and prepare to laugh at one of the more ridiculous comedies ever made.

 SHOW NOTES

Vampire Academy Joke


Police Academy - Trailer


Police Academy - Theme Song



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(Ep. 43): SR Podcast - April 2015

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES


Play-Doh!  YA Vamp movies! Good Friday & Passover Combined!  Get ready for the most eclectic episode of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast yet.  Justin and DJ finally pay their debts to Matthew by finally reviewing Vampire Academy.  And by reviewing...we mean trashing the hell out of it.  They also discuss how Fox does something right with Deadpool...then something way, way wrong with Play-Doh.  They also get their Artful Dodger on with the return of the segment Get Your Hand Out My Pocket.  Guard your jewels in this Holy edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

  SHOW NOTES

Play-Doh

Vampire Academy

Mad Max: Fury Road

Spectre

Best of Pennywise

Deadpool April Fools

We're No Angels

MUSIC NOTES

My Flows Is Tight By Lord Digga

We Gotta Get Out Of This Place By The Animals

Birds And Brass By Sort Of Soul

Plain Jane By Sid Phillips

The He-Man Opening That The Boys Are Spoofing

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(Ep. 42): Nobody’s Perfect - Movie Commentary: March 2015

October 17, 2016


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Thursday Movie Night!

Tonight's Movie Commentary is a little unknown film called

Nobody's Perfect

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1990 - PG13 - 90mins - Comedy

Starring the famous Lowe brother, Chad Lowe. Nobody's Perfect is about Stephen (possibly looking for a way to cross dress) is a tennis loving college student you falls for Shelly a chick who apparently can't pick the right guys. To get closer Stephen becomes Stephanie to befriend Shelly. It's all wacky fun from there...oh and rape. 


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(Ep. 41): SR Podcast - March 2015

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES

The Ides of March Approaches...and so does the March 2015 edition the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.  On this episode the boys chastise the person responsible for allowing a 72 year old Harrison Ford into an airplane.  Justin discovers a brand new...um...old show that is hilarious in all the right ways.  DJ questions if the Tommy Lee Jones we've seen in public is the real Tommy Lee Jones.  And Matt saves the lives of 3 people while eradicating another from existence.  All that and more on this 1.21 gigawatt powered episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

 SHOW NOTES

1.21 gigawatts 

Danger 5

Harrison Ford plane crash

Diablo Barbie

Age of Ultron Trailer

Danny Elfman Music in Age of Ultron 

Tommy Lee Jones commercial

Black & Blue or White & Gold Dress

MUSIC NOTES

My Flows Is Tight By Lord Digga

Back To The Future Theme By Alan Silvestri 

Back To The Future II Theme By Alan Silvestri

Back To The Future III Theme By Alan Silvestri

We Gotta Get Out Of This Place By The Animals

Welcome Back By Mase

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(Ep. 40): SR Oscar Prediction Podcast 2015

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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Hooray for Hollywood? Naw, it's time to skewer Hollywood and rip them and new one, of course while picking the winner's of this year's Academy Awards.

The boys go over all the essential categories from Best Score all the way to the grand-daddy of them all; "the award where they could have had 10 nominations, but they decided to go with eight."

Will "Boyhood" be this year's big winner? Will "Birdman" fly above the competition? Why was "Gone Girl" only nominated for one award? Why is the Academy in love with films that feature people with disabling diseases?  Is it a fetish that they secretly have that we don't know about?

All this and much more as the Simplistic Reviews Crew gives Hollywood the old "what-for."


Show Notes:

Hugh Jackman Hopping At Tony Awards


Music Notes: 

Blinded By The Lights By Streets,

That I'm Dreaming By Noel

If you're not interested in our ramblings, just check out our picks below:

Best Animated Feature*

Matt

Should Win: The Lego Movie / Will Win: Big Hero 6

DJ

Should Win: The Lego Movie / Will Win: How to Train Your Dragon 2

Justin

Should Win: The Boxtrolls / Will Win: How to Train Your Dragon 2

*Matt and DJ know that "The Lego Movie" isn't nominated, and it's a crime that it isn't.

Best Musical Score

Matt:

Should Win: The Grand Budapest Hotel / Will Win: The Theory of Everything

DJ:

Should Win: Interstellar / Will Win: The Theory of Everything

Justin:

Should Win: Interstellar / Will Win: Interstellar

Best Adapted Screenplay/Best Original Screenplay

Matt:

Should Win: Inherent Vice & Birdman / Will Win: American Sniper & Birdman

DJ:

Should Win: Whiplash & Birdman / Will Win: Whiplash & Birdman

Justin:

Should Win: The Theory of Everything & The Grand Budapest Hotel / Will Win: Sniper & Birdman

Best Cinematography

Matt:

Should Win: Birdman / Will Win: Birdman

DJ:

Should Win: Birdman / Will Win: Birdman

Justin:

Should Win: Grand Budapest Hotel / Will Win: Birdman

Best Director

Matt:

Should Win: Boyhood / Will Win: Boyhood

DJ:

Should Win: Birdman / Will Win: Boyhood

Justin:

Should Win: Birdman / Will Win: Boyhood

Best Supporting Actress

Matt:

Should Win: Emma Stone / Will Win: Patricia Arquette

DJ:

Should Win: Emma Stone / Will Win: Patricia Arquette

Justin:

Should Win: Emma Stone / Will Win: Meryl Streep

Best Supporting Actor

Matt

Should Win: Edward Norton / Will Win: J.K. Simmons

DJ:

Should Win: J.K. Simmons / Will Win: J.K. Simmons

Justin:

Should Win: J.K. Simmons / Will Win: J.K. Simmons

Best Actress

Matt:

Should Win: Rosamund Pike / Will Win: Julianne Moore

DJ:

Should Win: Rosamund Pike / Will Win: Julianne Moore

Justin:

Should Win: Rosamund Pike / Will Win: Julianne Moore

Best Actor*

Matt:

Should Win: Michael Keaton / Will Win: Eddie Redmayne

DJ:

Should Win: Jake Gyllenhaal / Will Win: Eddie Redmayne

Justin:

Should Win: Michael Keaton / Will Win: Bradley Cooper

*DJ understands Jake isn't nominated for "Nightcrawler" but he should have been.

Best Picture

Matt:

Should Win: Birdman / Will Win: Birdman

DJ:

Should Win: Birdman / Will Win: Boyhood

Justin:

Should Win: Birdman / Will Win: Boyhood


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(Ep. 39): Miami Connection - Movie Commentary: February 2015

October 17, 2016

Friday Night Movie Night!

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Tagline: Survival the ultimate test...

The year is 1987. Motorcycle ninjas tighten their grip on Florida's narcotics trade, viciously annihilating anyone who dares move in on their turf. Multi-national martial arts rock band Dragon Sound have had enough, and embark on a roundhouse wreck-wave of crime-crushing justice. When not chasing beach bunnies or performing their hit song "Against the Ninja," Mark (taekwondo master/inspirational speaker Y.K. Kim) and the boys are kicking and chopping at the drug world's smelliest underbelly. It'll take every ounce of their blood and courage, but Dragon Sound can't stop until they've completely destroyed the dealers, the drunk bikers, the kill-crazy ninjas, the middle-aged thugs, the "stupid cocaine"

...and the entire MIAMI CONNECTION!!!

Podcast Notes

Deleted Scene "Music Store"

Music

Dragon Sound "Friends"

Dragon Sound "Against The Ninja"

Miami Connection OST - Jon McCallum - Trainyard

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(Ep. 38): SR Podcast - Mid-February 2015

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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On this mid-February edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast, the boys attempt to break the record for most obscenities and deplorable subject matter brought up while still staying under the guise of a film and television review program.  Jairo from the True Bromance Film Podcast stops by to help them accomplish their mission.  They discuss the Spidey-Pocalypse...they discuss Michael Jordan's Hitler mustache....they disgrace anyone who watched 50 Shades of Grey...and they get all their frustrations out on Hollywood with one of their favorite games, Hey F*%khead.  All that and more on the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.  Seriously...take a shot whenever you hear an F-bomb. You'll be in rehab around halfway through

SHOW NOTES

MUSIC NOTES

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(Ep. 37): SR Podcast - February 2015

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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In this Super Bowl Edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast, we...um...don't talk about the Super Bowl.  We do talk to Dan Clark from The Talking In Circles Podcast.  Dan gives us his take on Pratt possibly being cast as Indiana Jones. In exchange for his well thought out analysis the boys force him to share deep dark secrets about himself on a segment we like to call Simply Ashamed.  DJ reveals how he lost his one true love, Matt reveals a hidden musical talent, and all three of them take great pleasure in the absurdity of the film Lean On Me.  All this and more on this Super Bowl/Non Super Bowl Edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast

SHOW NOTES

MUSIC NOTES

                           Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 36): SR Podcast - January 2015

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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It's a brand new year and a brand new episode of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.  This month the boys are not just joined by a Vern...they are joined by The Vern from The As You Watch Podcast and The Vern's Video Video Vortex.  They pop his Simplistic cherry with a good ol' game of Kill, F&%k, Marry.  And like all guests, the boys decide to go Inside The Podcaster...yes...it's as gross as it sounds.  Also...Julie and Vern admit their feeling for each other.  All this and more on this January 2015 edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast

Show Notes

Bill Cosby

Deadpool Dead

No Bourne Crossover

Wolverine Dead

Quicksilver & Scarlet Witch No Longer Mutants

Fantastic Four Josh Trank Set Report

Batman v Superman Split

Music Notes

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Theme

G.I. Joe Theme

Thundercats Theme

Birds & Brass By Sort Of Soul

Action In Memphis By Johnny Pearson

My Flows Is Tight By Lord Digga

Inside The Actors Studio Theme Angelo Badalamenti

                           Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 35) SR Podcast 2014 Year End Wrap Up Show

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY


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You thought you might have heard the last of us this year.......uh, uh, uh.  The Best...The Worst...The Most Anticipated...And More!  The boys at Simplistic Reviews close off 2014 with a conversation about the best and worst films of the year. They also take a look into the future and geek out about their most anticipated films of 2015. Justin begs for movies in the future to make him laugh, Matt admits to having a thing for maniacs, DJ’s blood pressure spikes when talking about his most hated film, Julie makes an insensitive joke about North Korea, which more than likely prompts the site’s eventual hacking.  Download and listen...while you can.

NOTES

Sigmund Freud Joke Explanation

We Gotta Get Outta This Place by The Animals...OUR NEW 2015 CLOSING THEME SONG!

Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 34): SR Podcast - December 2014 Holiday Edition

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

Ho-Ho-Holy Sh%t!   It's December again and the boys at Simplistic Reviews has a show full of holiday cheer.  They've got partridges...pear trees....dreidels...Santa letters/threats...Olaf the snowman from Frozen...black stormtroopers...Kevin Feige: Stand-Up Comedian...megalomaniac Mickey Mouse...holiday movie spoilers...all that and more on the 2014 Holiday Edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

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Show Notes:

Star Wars Trailer

Suicide Squad Casting

Spectre

Stand-Up Comedian from the 80s Fashion

Music Notes:

Christmas Is All Around Us By Billy Mack

My Flows is Tight By Lord Digga

Christmas Vacation By Mavis Staples

Christmas Time Is Here By The Vince Guaraldi Trio 

Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 33): Planes, Trains and Automobiles - Movie Commentary: November 2014

October 17, 2016

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So it’s Thanksgiving when everyone is thankful. Here at Simplistic Reviews we’re thankful for some great films including some really crappy ones. But this time we decided today was the best to explore one the greatest films Planes, Trains and Automobiles.

Everyone come! Sit around the table. Pour a glass of whatever wets your whistle.

Grab your turkey and stuffing, and make sure you save some room for a SR Movie Commentary!

Today we explore the greatness that is John Hughes and touch up on our geography. We will laugh and shed a tear. We’ll talk about a fantastic soundtrack and do you have any room for some Bacon, some Kevin Bacon!?!?

Everyone sit around the fire and let’s listen to Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary of Planes, Trains and Automobiles!

Eh well maybe you shouldn’t listen to this SR Movie Commentary with the family at Thanksgiving…or should you? Only one way to find out right?

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 32): Halloween Edition 2014

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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On this Spooktacular Halloween edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast, the boys welcome back JD Duran from Insession Film.  Other than further corrupting this classy professional podcaster...the boys talk about Marvel's HUGE announcements, DC's HUGE announcements, gush over The Flash, bitch more about Gotham, comment on the Boardwalk Empire finale, Walking Dead premiere, and consider NBC's Constantine.  JD also gets to moderate our second ever draft, which this time involves the boys trying to make their best monster squad.  It's a razor 'blade in the apple' sort of show that you don't want to miss.


SHOW NOTES

Insession Film

Cenobites

The Monster Squad

Marvel Film Slate

DC Film Slate

Age Of Ultron Teaser

Age Of Ultron Extended

Ever See Chinatown Motherf@%ker?!

Skinny Zach Galafanakis

Jason Biggs pissing on Chelsea Handler

MUSIC NOTES

"Nightmare On My Street" By DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince

"Autumn Thunder" By Sam Spence

"My Flows Is Tight" By Lord Digga

"Inside The Actors Studio" By Angelo Badalamenti

Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 31): SR Podcast - October 2014

October 17, 2016

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As fall descends across the land, the Simplistic Reviews Podcast is the funk of 40,000 years. In this month's edition, the boys spring forward and fall back to poking fun at Shia LeBeouf's childhood proclivities, Urban Dictionary's more interesting entries, and Jeremy Renner's lackadaisical attitude toward his career.  All while still having time to pay a little John Singleton penance.

As you might remember, Justin and Matt were unlucky enough to lose a game of Simply Quotable a couple of month's back and had to watch the 2001 hood classic, Baby Boy.  To make a long story short, there is dick sniffing, Snoop Dogg shooting, and men-inside-giant-wombs talk.

The boys also tackle the news Bob Barker style in a new segment called Simplistic Showcase.  There is big money, big prizes, and a variety of obscenities. 

All of this, plus our take on Fox's Gotham, how Boardwalk Empire is doing so far, and soooooooo much more, on this month's Simplistic Reviews Podcast for October.

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

Show Notes:

Blumpkin

Tetris Movie

Charlie Countryman

Baby Boy got the sniffles

Inherent Vice

DJ's Hidden Princess Bride Reference

Matt's Hidden Big Lebowski Reference Slaughter Film Action Movie Time Machine

Music Notes:

Birds & Brass By Sort Of Soul

Lawyers, Guns, And Money By Warren Zevon

Game of Thrones Theme Remix

White Lines By Grandmaster Flash and Melle Mel

My Flows is Tight By Lord Digga

Pure Imagination By Gene Wilder

Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 30): Die Hard: Movie Commentary - September 2014

October 17, 2016


DIE HARD

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 The gang is back with another Movie Commentary! After Lethal Weapon 2 what film could the gang follow with but the classic masterpiece known as, DIE HARD! That's right HANS! Take your shoes off and curl those toes on the carpet, we are going to start to blow some sh%t up! Get your Alan Rickman voice ready and hold on tight because one of the greatest action films with some of the most amazing deaths may also be one of the greatest Christmas films.  That also means Ode to Joy will be playing in your ear for a solid week.

So lets get our kill on!

(Please note: Simplistic Reviews does not condone real killing, only in your imagination, we are all for that ;)

Show Notes:

Alan Rickman's Answering Machine

Let's order a pizza!

Bill Clay

Music Notes:

Die Hard Ode To Joy 

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY


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(Ep. 29): SR Podcast - September 2014

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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The boys are back, and ready to slap you, your momma, and your whole family in the face, literally.  I mean you've heard the things they say, having your family slapped would be the least of your worries.

This month the boys have a rapid fire edition of talk in the new segment "Can Your Dig It?" And they fantasize about what might be in the pockets of film characters in the newest game "Get Your Hand Out Of My Pocket."

Plus, since The Simplistic Reviews is world renown, the guys get visited by Kevin Feige, Guillermo del Toro and the incomparable Al Pacino.  No really.  Well...not really.  But kinda really.  That, Jessica Chastain hate, concern for Hayden Panettiere and what Keith David pulls out for air in this month's Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

Show Notes:

Keith David not pulling it out for air

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(Ep. 28): SR Podcast - July 2014

October 17, 2016

 FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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As Summer continues, the guys from Simplistic Reviews get a little hot under the collar. This month DJ and Matt rip into Kate Mara for her contempt of comic book films and their fans, while also paying their debts in a new segment where they FINALLY review the 2004 Ice Cube motorcycle classic "Torque."

The guys also go over what they took away from this year's San Diego Comic-Con and get their quote on with another addition of Simply Quotable with the stakes even higher this time around.

All this, and so much more, on this month's edition of the Simplistic Review Podcast.

Show Notes:

Kate Mara on FF4

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(Ep. 27): Lethal Weapon 2 - Movie Commentary July 2014

October 17, 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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 Alright folks, it's time to dust off your flannel, feather your mullet and bust out the VCR again because it's time for another Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary. We return to 1989 with another classic; "Lethal Weapon 2." The sequel to another classic,"Lethal Weapon," "Weapon 2" pretty much ups the ante over it's predecessor and exceeds and it some ways. This time around Riggs and Murtaugh are on the trail of a group of South Africans who are into some shady dealings, including a guy who might be David Warner.

Whereas "Weapon 1" was a pretty dark film, "Weapon 2" is a the perfect balance of humor, bombastic action, and gritty cop drama. With that said, sit back, strap yourself in (if you're into that type of thing) and get ready to yuck it up with three guys who make Jones, Mahoney, and Hooks look like legit cops with "Lethal Weapon 2."

Show Notes:

Riggs Might Go Nuts

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(Ep. 26): SR Podcast - June 2014

October 17, 2016

 FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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 The end of June brings another edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.  This month the boys discuss Batman's out of control property damage, play a game of Word Association, berate Chelsea Handler, swoon rather uncomfortably over Fargo, Godzilla's tail and Eva Green, then promote the Patrick Dempsey 80s classic Loverboy.  Yes, we are using "classic" loosely.  All that and more on a dog days of Summer edition of the Simplistic Review Podcast.

Show Notes:

Loverboy

DJ's Hidden Eli Wallach Reference

Mad Max Reboot

Pacific Rim 2 Announcement

Cloud Atlas Valleyspeak

Gary Oldman Apology

Jonah Hill Apology

Music Notes:

Birds & Brass By Sort Of Soul

Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 25): June 2014 - Batman 89 Movie Commentary

October 17, 2016

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It's June and it's Podcast time! But this one is special. Today we celebrate the 25th Anniversary of 1989's classic, Batman. So we decided to try something new, join us today as we give you a SR Movie Commentary! Our first commentary and very possibly not our last commentary ;)

So queue up those VCR's...hmmm wait sorry....DVD's, Blu-rays and this Podcast and have a blast to the past with us. You can watch our YouTube video, listen to the Podcast or stream the commentary with the full film on dropbox!

Click here for the Dropbox Video Stream

Show Notes:

Wait did Julie Kill someone?!

Music Notes:

Birds & Brass By Sort Of Soul

Batman: The Video Game Composer(s) Naoki Kodaka, Nobuyuki Hara

Batman OST by Prince

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Letterboxd, Pinterest and Grab the SR App


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(Ep. 24): SR Podcast - May 2014

October 17, 2016

It's May, and wouldn't you know it, we're on time this time! The Simplistic Reviews Podcast is once again....ON TIME!

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This month we recap all that was the month of May, with a special guest appearance from America's OTHER favorite black guy, the DC Fanboy himself, Neal DaSouza. The quartet discuss the hidden beauty behind Grace Jones in "View to a Kill", where Marvel is finally showing the chinks in their armor, and all take part in a rather "arousing" rendition of "Kill, F*ck, or Marry." We also get a little literary, literally, when the guys talk about which graphic novel, book, or comic book arc should be adapted for the big or small screen in this month's "Simply the Best."

All that and so much more in their May Edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

Note: I realize that I switched between speaking in the first and third person, but that's just one of the benefits of being a little, how you say.......insane.

 Show Notes:

Christopher Walken Freaking Out

May Day

The End of Marvel?

Zohan Catches Bullet

May Day Sleeps With Bond

Music Notes:

Birds & Brass By Sort Of Soul

Word Up By Cameo

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(Ep. 23): Batman 75th Anniversary Special

October 17, 2016

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In honor of The Dark Knight's 75th Anniversary, the Simplistic Reviews Podcast got the whole gang together to talk about the legacy of Batman.  Now you're probably wondering...what makes that different from any other show?  Ummmm...not much.  Although, the boys do hold an NFL style Draft of Batman villains who they think could kill the Caped Crusader.  Afterwards the draft grades are given out by a very special guest arbiter brought in to class up and beautify the proceedings...Matthew's very own lovely wife Nicole Stewart.  No, she does not show any favoritism.  Yes, their marriage nearly comes apart at the seams.  No, Justin, DJ, and Neal don't try to help matters.    The boys discuss Batfleck's new Batsuit and also pick out their own favorite versions of Batman and Joker on a very special Simply The Best segment.

Grab your cape, your cowl, your shark repellent, and your Bat credit card and enjoy the show!

Show Notes:

Bat Shark Repellant

Batman Scares Deadshot

Batfleck Suit

Mr. Freeze Saying Nora

Trailer For Batman TAS Episode Over The Edge

Batman Rogues Gallery Pre-Draft Rankings

Music Notes:

The Best By Tina Turner

Batman '89 Theme By Danny Elfman

Batman Begins Theme By Hans Zimmer

Batman '66 Intro Theme By Neal Hefti

American Idol Theme By Cathy Dennis

Monday Night Football Theme By Johnny Pearson

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(Ep. 22): SR Podcast April 2014 - Late Edition

October 17, 2016

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On this late edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast, Matt, DJ, and Justin try to catch up on the month that was April.  They take their turn ridiculing soon to be former LA Clippers owner Donald Sterling then debut a new game called Simply Lying.  The losers of this game will have to watch and review the 2004 film Torque.  Yeah, they'd have been better off fighting to the death.  We do get a pretty decent Terrence Howard impersonation from Matthew out of it and learn some of the lesser known criminal activities of Samuel L. Jackson.  That, reactions to Star Wars casting, Julie's descent into HYDRA and much much more on this episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.


 Show Notes:

DJ's Hidden Princess Bride Reference

X-Men Days Of Future Past

Donald Sterling

Hail Hydra

Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome

Torque

Music Notes:

Birds & Brass By Sort Of Soul

Liar Liar By The Castaways

Lawyers, Guns, And Money By Warren Zevon

The Best By Tina Turner


FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 21): SR Podcast - March 2014

October 16, 2016

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 Here's a drinking game.  Take a shot every time the boys mention Michael Bay's new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.  No, wait...you'll be dead in like 10 minutes.  Okay, take a shot every time they insult Michael Bay's new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.  No, no, you'll be dead in about the same amount of time.  Neal DaSouza fills in for an ailing Matthew Stewart and helps discuss various members of the cinematic animal kingdom.  From Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, to Alvin And The Chipmunks, to something called Rastamouse.  (And you thought anthropomorphic turtles was disturbing.)  The boys also air more dirty laundry in their most embarrassing segment, Simply Ashamed, and each pick their favorite non-Marvel Studios Marvel movie.  I got my fingers crossed for Howard The Duck.  All that and more on the March edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

 Show Notes:

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2014 Trailer

X-Men: Days Of Future Past Trailer

Constantine Promotional Picture

Ben McKenzie As James Gordon

Alvin And The Chipmunks Animated Movie

Rainbow Bright The Movie

Dragnet Rap Song

Don't Be A Menace Cop Scene With Bernie Mac

Rastamouse

Music Notes:

Birds & Brass By Sort Of Soul

Its A Shame Remix By The Spinners

Lawyers, Guns, And Money By Warren Zevon

The Best By Tina Turner


FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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(Ep. 20): SR Podcast - February 2014

October 16, 2016

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In a desperate attempt the gain some respectability, The Simplistic Reviews Podcast has on special guest from Insession Film, JD Duran.  But in only twenty minutes, the boys corrupt this once reputable man to the point where he is setting fire to the Academy Awards, secretly stalking Jennifer Lawrence, and verbally berating Will Smith.  All in a days work for Matt, Justin and DJ.  Enjoy this corrupting episode of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast....oh...and the boys conjure the ghosts of Orson Welles and Alfred Hitchcock...yeah...that happened.

 Show Notes:

Unicron

Winter's Tale

Mission Impossible III

Almost Famous

Key & Peele Liam Neeson Commercial

True Detective Tracking Shot

Music Notes:

Birds & Brass By Sort Of Soul

The Great Escape Theme By Elmer Bernstein

Lawyers, Guns, And Money By Warren Zevon

The Best By Tina Turner 

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FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

     

Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

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(Ep. 19): SR Podcast - January 2014

October 16, 2016

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 Welcome to 2014! It might be a new year, but we can guarantee that the boys will still be as juvenile as ever.  In the first full podcast of the year, the gang has some fun with words as Matt takes on "Word Association."  From Shia LeBouf to the latest Warner Bros/DC calamity. No one is safe.

Neal also regales the gang with his adventures with rednecks at his local Monster Truck Show, and Justin mistakenly believes Shaquille O'Neal starred in "Hanging With Mr. Cooper."

This is just a taste of what you're getting into with this month's Simplistic Review Podcast.

 Show Notes:

Most Anticipated Films of 2014

Hanging With Mr. Cooper

GraveDigger

Son-UVA Digger

Bobby Digital

Music Notes:

Birds & Brass By Sort Of Soul

I Dream Of Jeanie (Remix)

Lawyers, Guns, And Money By Warren Zevon

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FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

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(Ep. 18): SR Podcast - Oscar Nomination Reaction Special

October 16, 2016

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 It's that time of the year again folks.  You might think "Oh, the time of the year where you continue to embarrass yourself with your inept film talk?"  Well, yeah, that too, but we're talking about The Academy Award Nominations sillies.

Join DJ, Justin, and Matt as they go over the nominations, share their disdain for the people who got nominated and their joy for those who got snubbed.  It's sure to be a super-rad time on this special edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

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Show Notes:

Full List of Oscar Nominations 2014

Biggest Oscar Upsets

Worst Oscar Winners

Music Notes:

"All Gold Everything" By Trindad James

"Police Academy March" By Robert Folk

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.



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(Ep. 17): SR Podcast - Year End Wrap Up 2013

October 16, 2016

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In the blink of an eye, 2013 is over and we look towards 2014 here on The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.  In this special edition of The Podcast, DJ, Justin, Matt, and Neal give their two-cents on the best and worst of the year in film and TV, and I'm sure a lot more.

Will "Grown Ups 2" stand alone as a worse mistake than Greedo shooting first, or will "White House Down" prove that Barack Obama is funnier than Jamie Foxx?

All of this and so much more on The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.  Happy New Year and see all you clowns in 2014.

Show Notes:

Best Films of 2013

Worst Films of 2013

Best TV of 2013

Music Notes:

"Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is" By Chicago

"Your The Best" By Joe Esposito

"Background Music" By Seeburg

"Auld Lang Syne" By Kenny G

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(Ep. 16): SR Podcast - Decemeber 2013

October 16, 2016

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'Tis the season to talk movies and TV...and R.Kelly..and...um... Jolene Blalock's disappearance...and Lara Flynn Boyle?  I'm pretty sure that's not how the song goes.

An oddly optimistic Justin Polizzi makes his triumphant return and unveils his latest character impression.  Neal DaSouza joins us again to talk some anime and take dictation.  DJ is confused over the midseason finale of The Walking Dead and discovers he has some sort of Die Hard Tourette's Syndrome.  Matt starts an all out war between people of the Jewish faith and jolly ol' Saint Nick in a new segment called Dear Santa.  And a crippled little boy is able to walk again at the end.  It's a Christmas Miracle!  Sorry, that last bit I made up or partially stole from Charles Dickens.  But I swear, the rest of that stuff does happen on the holiday edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

Show Notes:

Ellis From Die Hard

Police Academy

R.Kelly Cookie Song

Detective Quentin Lance

Akira

Jolene Blalock

Lara Flynn Boyle Is Melting

Music:

"Holiday Road" By Lindsey Buckingham

New_Podcast_Logo.jpg"Christmas In Hollis" By Run D.M.C.

"Christmas Time Is Here" By Vince Guaraldi

"The Best" By Tina Turner

"Let It Snow" By Vaughn Monroe

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

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(Ep. 15): SR Podcast - November 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: November Edition

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 As Turkey Day draws to a close, the boys recap the month of November with Anime and Asian Cinema aficionado Neal DaSouza. They talk about black films, black Kermit The Frog, and Blacklist.  Not necessarily in that order.

The boys also introduce an old game with a new twist. A game titled with the infamous anagram K.F.M. (Look it up on the interwebs kiddies). Remakes, Wolves of Wall Street, and Roadhouse throat rips.  Gobble up all that and more, pilgrim, on the Thanksgiving edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.  Yes, that was a pretty bad use of word play.  So what?  Sue me.  Wait, don't sue me.  I'm so incredibly poor.

Show Notes:

Kermit The Frog

Roadhouse

K.F.M. Game

The Blacklist

Sleepy Hollow

The Wolf Of Wall Street

Music:

"Birds And Brass" By Sort Of Soul

"Word Up" By Cameo

"Fame" By David Bowie

"The Best" By Tina Turner

"Little Less Conversation" - Elvis Presley

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

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(Ep. 14): SR Presents Indie Insider - “Stuck” Interview With Angela Palladino

October 16, 2016

Simplistic Reviews presents: Indie Insider - Stuck, Interview with Director Angela Palladino

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In our first in a series of interviews we will be conducting during the production of the film "Stuck," Simplistic Reviews is happy to have Writer, Producer, and Director, Angela Palladino, on this Simplistic Reviews Podcast special, "Indie Insider."  SR's own, Matthew Stewart, runs the gamut with Angela that stretches from her motivation to film "Stuck," who inspires her, and what it's like to film close to home.

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Angela's Indiegogo Page

Main (Stuck) Website

(Stuck) on Indiegogo

(Stuck) on IMDB

(Stuck) on Facebook

(Stuck) Trailer

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(Ep. 13): SR Podcast - October 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: October Edition

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 The boys are back with another hard-hitting, face-melting, knee-slapping, balls-to-the-wall edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.  October draws to a close with Halloween on their minds as they breakdown the best Horror Monsters/Villains/Demons of all-time.

The boys also vent their anger in another round of "Hey F%*khead" and no one is safe.  Everyone from Julliane Hough to Michael Bay are ripped limb from limb for their stupidity and overall douchebaggery.

Add in some TV talk, Casper the Friendly Rapist, and a barn-full of shenanigans and you got a podcast worth downloading and listening to while you're running on the elliptical machine.  Enjoy!

Show Notes:

Julianne Hough in Blackface

Chris Brown Still Beating People

History of Halloween

Scariest Horror Villains

Music:

"Birds And Brass" By Sort Of Soul

"Word Up" By Cameo

"The Great Escape" By Elmer Bernstein

"The Best" By Tina Turner

New_Podcast_Logo.jpg"Little Less Conversation" - Elvis Presley

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

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(Ep. 12): SR Podcast - September 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: September Edition

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 Yay!  The rest of the months for the rest of the year end with -ber!  You can tell we are easily excited over on Simplistic Reviews, especially this month of September.

As we reach the final quarter of 2013, and our one-year anniversary of podcasting to the Interwebs, we go all out this month, well, not really, but we have to do something to get you guys excited.

In this September edition of the Simplistic Reviews podcast we talk tons of Fall TV, the final episodes of "Breaking Bad," just how bad the remake of "Robocop" will be, the return of Simply Quotable, and our favorite sports films of all time.

All this, including a surprise cameo by Al Pacino as he gets all hot and bothered about the classic Amanda Bynes' TV show "What I Like About You."  Who-Ahhhhh!!!!

Check out the show notes below for more fun stuff, and coming this week, The Simplistic Reviews List of things that we've learned from "Breaking Bad."

Show Notes:

Robocop Remake

SlaughterFilm

Cinema and Suds

Fall TV Schedule

Breaking Bad Theories

Music:

"Birds And Brass" By Sort Of Soul

"Word Up" By Cameo

"Fame" By David Bowie

"The Best" By Tina Turner

"Little Less Conversation" - Elvis Presley

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FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

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(Ep.11): SR Podcast - August 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: August Edition

Hello boils and ghouls.  Okay, this isn't the Cryptkeeper, and it's nearly three months away from Halloween, but I couldn't help myself.  But what I can offer you is The Simplistic Reviews Podcast for the month of August (and some of June and July, we had a lot to catch up on in this edition).

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 After an extended hiatus the boys are back (of course this is Matt speaking in the 3rd person) and maybe not better then ever, but at least their adequate.  This month they jump into the "Ben Affleck as Batman" debate head first, share their shame in everyone's favorite segment, "Simply Ashamed," talk some "Breaking Bad," celebrate the filmography of Sinbad, and campaign for the best film coming this Fall.

Be sure to check the show notes below for more fun and hijinks.

Show Notes:

What Makes Breaking Bad so good?

SlaughterFilm

Cinema and Suds

Fall Movie Preview

Music:

"Birds And Brass" By Sort Of Soul

"Word Up" By Cameo

"Fame" By David Bowie

"The Best"By Tina Turner

"Little Less Conversation" - Elvis Presley

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

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(Ep. 10): One Year Anniversary Extravaganza 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: One Year Anniversary Extravaganza

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 It's hard to believe that Simplistic Reviews has been around for one year.  You would have thought that the FCC, Michael Bay, or some other Hollywood douchebag would have called in a favor and had the three of us involved in an unfortunate electrical or chemical accident.  I guess they feared that if that happened we would genetically mutate and plan to conquer the world, or in the least just keep doing podcasts since their plans failed.  Well, we're not genetically mutating anytime soon, but we are going to continue rocking the Interwebs with our colorful dialogue and point-of-views

On a serious note, we would like to thank everyone who reads our reviews, leaves comments, likes our Facebook page, re-tweets our tweets, and/or listens to our podcasts.  As Simplistic Reviews enters our sophomore year we'll continue to either tear movies apart or heap unlimited amounts of praise upon them.

In this special podcast we look back at the first two films reviewed on the site, "Lethal Weapon" and "Die Hard" arguably the two best action movies of the 80's, if not, ever.  And since we like games so much, we introduce the newest Simplistic Reviews game, "Martin Or McClane" where we decide who has the best 80's hair, John McClane or Martin Riggs.  So sit back, relax, and enjoy this anniversary edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

Show Notes:

Lethal Weapon Review

Die Hard Review

New_Podcast_Logo.jpgZack and Miri Make A Porno Review

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(Ep. 9): A Little More Conversation 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: A Little More Conversation

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 If you've been following our podcast since it's inception, you know we like to rant, rave, and go on intense tangents.  Well this month we decided to take an entire unaired section of our May Podcast and turn it into a bonus edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

In this little nugget of joy we take on Iron Man 3, Star Trek Into Darkness and you get to hear Matt sink lower and lower into drunkenness.  It's really a thing of beauty......and sadness.  On top of that we also delve into Peter Weller's filmography and imagine if Robocop decided to police Hogwarts.

Show Notes:

Iron Man 3

Star Trek Into Darkness

Effects of Alcohol on Speech

Peter Weller

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FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

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(Ep. 8): SR Podcast - May 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: May Edition

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 May.....June....who cares?  It's another Simplistic Reviews Podcast posting in June, but they're talking about things in May.  Yeah, that's just how these clowns roll.

From Philip Seymour Hoffman's smack habit to the benefits of drinking whiskey during a podcast (thanks Matt), we got you covered.  Oh, and why HPV saved Michael Douglas' life.

The guys also unleash their newest segment "Hey Fu*khead" where they unload on people and things that are ruining the world and the sad lives of DJ, Justin, and Matt.

And for you TV-heads, our hosts take a look at the upcoming Fall TV schedule and break down what to see, what to watch with caution, and what to avoid like the plague.

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*Correction to podcast:  Alan Silvestri did not score the Friday the 13th films, it was actually Harry Manfredini.

Show Notes:

Hoffman's Habit

The Rains of Castamere

Best of Fall TV 2013

Deep Throating for HPV

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

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(Ep. 7): SR Podcast - April 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: April Edition

It's that time of the month again, take that as you may, but you won't need any tampons to listen to April's Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

In this month's edition we ponder who is more evil, Red Skull or Adolf Hitler, Sheri Moon Zombie's ass, and Justin tries to sell Matt on Mad Men, and the P-word gets thrown into the mix.

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 The guys also test their movie quote knowledge in the new segment, "Simply Quotable," and do a little Summer movie preview of their own with Iron Man already making waves.

If you like good wholesome family fun, well, find another podcast.  If you like three guys talking out of their ass for over an hour, well, now you're on the right track with The Simplistic Reviews podcast.

Also, May 6th is National Nightmare Day, a Day to celebrate the 1984 horror classic "A Nightmare on Elm Street."  Check over at SlaughterFilm.com for more information.

Show Notes:

Hannibal Review

Summer Movie Preview

The Benefit of Mad Men

National Nightmare Day

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(Ep. 6): SR Podcast - March 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast : March 2013

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 You might ask yourself, "Hey Simplistic Reviews!  It's April, this isn't the March Podcast."  Well, yeah, you're right......that's all I got.  You got us listening public, this is the March Simplistic Reviews Podcast, posted in April.

We discuss everything from chocolate Easter bunnies to Peeps and even fit in some time to worship the Season Three Premiere of "Game of Thrones."

And while it seems like we have no shame (have you listened to any of our previous podcasts) we actually do, as we introduce a new segment, "Simply Ashamed" where we talk about crying, bestiality, and illegally recording "Ghost Rider," but not necessarily in that order.

So gather around the old iPod, or your Zune, bring grandma and enjoy the fun of The Simplistic Reviews March Podcast.

Show Notes

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Sexy Cartoon Babes

Game of Thrones Love

Understanding Shame

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(Ep. 5): SR Podcast- February Late Edition 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast Late Edition: February 2013

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FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

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 Like the old cliche; "better late than never" The Simplistic Reviews Podcast is back, and we're just as cliched as we were back in January.

In this February edition we wax poetic on the failings of non-Marvel Studios films, pass judgement on Bruce Willis' latest John McClane adventure, "A Good Day To Die Hard," and rip Seth MacFarlane a new one.

Plus, this time Matt is in the hot seat with another edition of "Word Association." From Harrison Ford to breast milk, nothing is off limits to Matt's rage, while Justin and DJ have their feelings hurt by our cybernetic robo-babe, Julie.

All this and much more in our "late" February podcast, right here on Simplistic Reviews.

Show Notes

Boycotting Non-Marvel Comic Films

A "Good" Day to "Die Hard"

Why Seth MacFarlane Sucks

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(Ep. 4): SR Podcast - Awards Edition

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: 2013 Oscars Special

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 In this very special edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast we break down the 2013 Academy Award, this Sunday, February 24th.  Will "Argo" make The Academy rue the day they didn't nominate Ben Affleck for a best actor award for "Gigli?"  Will another French Revolution occur with "Amour?"  Will we ever get to see the SyFy Original movie, "Zero Dark Thirty-One: The Return of bin Laden?"

All of this and much, much more in our special Oscar edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.  Below are the categories we cover in the podcast, with our favorites BOLDED.

Best Animated Film: FRANKENWEENIE

PIRATES: BAND OF MISFITS

BRAVE

PARANORMAN

WRECK IT RALPH

Best Screenplay Adapted: CHRIS TERRIO-ARGO,

LUCY ALIBAR & BEN ZEITLIN-BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD

DAVID MAGEE-LIFE OF PI,

TONY KUSHNER- LINCOLN

DAVID O. RUSSELL-SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

Best Original Screenplay: MICHAEL HANEKE-AMOUR,

QUENTIN TARANTINO-DJANGO

JOHN GATINS-FLIGHT

WES ANDERSON & ROMAN COPPOLA-MOONRISE KINGDOM

MARK BOAL-ZERO DARK THIRTY

Directing: MICHAEL HANEKE-AMOUR,

BEN ZEITLIN-BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD

ANG LEE-LIFE OF PI

STEVEN SPIELBERG-LINCOLN

DAVID O. RUSSELL-SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

Best Supporting Actress: AMY ADAMS-THE MASTER

SALLY FIELD-LINCOLN

ANNE HATHAWAY-LES MISERABLES

HELEN HUNT-THE SESSIONS

JACKI WEAVER-SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK.

Best Supporting Actor: ALAN ARKIN-ARGO

ROBERT DENIRO-SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

 PHILIP SEYMOUR HOFFMAN-THE MASTER

TOMMY LEE JONES-LINCOLN

CHRISTOPH WALTZ-DJANGO UNCHAINED

Best Actress: JESSICA CHASTAIN-ZERO DARK THIRTY

 JENNIFER LAWRENCE-SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

EMMANUELLE RIVA-AMOUR

QUVENZHANE WALLIS-BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD

NAOMI WATTS-THE IMPOSSIBLE

Best Actor: BRADLEY COOPER-SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

DANIEL DAY-LEWIS-LINCOLN

HUGH JACKMAN-LES MISERABLES

JOAQUIN PHOENIX-THE MASTER

DENZEL WASHINGTON-FLIGHT

Best Picture-AMOUR,

LIFE OF PI

ARGO

LINCOLN

BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD

SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

DJANGO UNCHAINED

ZERO DARK THIRTY

LES MISERABLES

Show Notes

Official Academy Awards Site

headphones_wide_by_molotov_arts1+copy.jpDjango Review

Silver Linings Playbook Review

The Master Review

Zero Dark Thirty Review

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

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(Ep. 3): SR Podcast - January 2013

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: January 2013

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Our first podcast of the year, and we'd like to thank all the fans and readers for making 2012 a success for us.  Right out of the gates we discuss how J.J. Abrams will balance his responsibilities between "Star Trek" and "Star Wars."  We judge the HBO original series "Girls" in our newest segment, "Open & Shut" where we channel our inner Jack McCoy and Atticus Finch.  And we debate what is the Biggest Bad-ass 80s Action Film in "Simply the Best."

All of this, and much more, including a beer can with no manners, Bill Murray getting hand jobs, and our longing for Saturday Morning Cartoons.

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.
Show Notes:
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Matt's take on Girls
The Force is strong with Abrams
Great courtroom scenes
The best of 80s Action

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(Ep. 2): SR Podcast - December 2012

October 16, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: December 2012

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 You've all been clamoring for it, well here it is.  The Simplistic Reviews Podcast for December 2012!  In this sophomore edition we dig into the holiday season with what made us happy in the cinema during 2012.  From "The Dark Knight Rises" to the re-release of "Pulp Fiction" we touch it all, and not in that inappropriate way....okay, just over the pants, but give us a break.

We also give AMC, Nerds, "The Vow", and British -Voiced Nazis a hard time in our newest segment, "Sincerely."

All this and more on The Simplistic Reviews Podcast for December 2012.

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.
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(Ep. 1): SR Podcast - November 2012

October 16, 2016
The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: November 2012

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.
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Welcome all to the inaugural Simplistic Reviews Podcast! This is something that we had been planning for a while, and we finally got it done. This edition we talk James Bond, namely, his newest adventure "Skyfall," and remember some of his greatest villains and which James Bond theme song speaks to us.

Not in that creepy way that your uncle used to when he was drunk during Thanksgiving.

We also talk TV, where DJ explains why "Arrow" is his newest guilty pleasure, Justin talks about balls dropping, and why Jewish people aren't allowed to watch "Mad Men," while Matt asks "Why is AMC so stupid!"

We also wonder "What is it about Ghost Dad that gets our motors revving?" And "What was Morgan Freeman really doing during his voice over sessions on "March of the Penguins?"

All this and more on The Simplistic Reviews Podcast for November 2012.

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