Simplistic Reviews Podcasts
Simplistic Reviews is everything your parents told you to not turn into. We talk and review movies, TV and games from the past and the present. Light that fire and bring the family in to enjoy, don’t worry if you don’t have a fire because we’ll always bring the warmth. Visit us at www.Simplistic.Reviews
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Episodes
Tuesday Sep 04, 2018
Tuesday Sep 04, 2018
(without Movie Audio)
Well it's not Samurai Cop...
Welcome back to the Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary! Today we pop in another Amir Shervan film, Killing American Style. It's the 80's and of course Amir will recycle from his masterpiece Samurai Cop; location, music and beefy men with long beautiful hair. The terrible acting mix with cheesy fight scene is the best part along with its nonexistent script. Killing American Style is no Samurai Cop. It's not as funny nor crazy but still a entertaining film except for one thing - rape.
The amount of creepiness is beyond anything we have seen before. There really isn't a need for rape in a movie, especially when the story line doesn't call for it. A simple walk into the room with the door closing gets it point across, what we get here is out of control and unnecessary. Killing American Style is a fun Sunday film to drink and laugh at, just look at that title. But when your looking for another Samurai Cop don't look at Killing American Style, it's in a league of its own.
Tuesday Aug 07, 2018
Tuesday Aug 07, 2018
S1:E2 - Simplistic Reviews Show Live!
Gather the children around, episode 2 has arrived.
Simplistic Reviews Show Live! is a talk show. If you thought the gang couldn't possibly talk more than their Simplistic Reviews Podcast or Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary, then you thought wrong. Today we talk about some Fallout, debrief our last movie commentary Uncle Sam as well reveal the next movie commentary and look at some news.
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Monday Jul 30, 2018
Monday Jul 30, 2018
Uncle Sam
R
1996 ‧ Slasher/Horror ‧ 1h 30m
A Gulf War veteran rises from the dead to wreak vengeance upon unpatriotic residents of his hometown.
Initial release: 1996
Director: William Lustig
Release date: 1996 (Greece)
Budget: 2 million USD
Screenplay: Larry Cohen
Because you asked for it, here it is... Uncle Sam!
The classic blockbuster video rental slasher is a great way to celebrate America's birthday! Nothing like some patriotic killing to make us American hard. Okay children grab that flag and those sparklers, bite into your U.S. grade hamburgers and pop in Uncle Sam...This is Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary!
Monday Jul 23, 2018
Monday Jul 23, 2018
Welcome to our new live show - Simplistic Reviews Show Live!
Ep.1 is here!
Today we talk all things Comic Con
Look at some odd news in this crazy world we live in
and play the game, "Are They Dead Yet?"
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Tuesday Jul 17, 2018
Tuesday Jul 17, 2018
It's July, so that means it's time for a summer blowout episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast. We broach many subjects includrtl=0" width="100%">ng Star Wars' big problem, Robocop reboots, Chris Hardwick's troubles, and the Naked Gun. Yes...that assortment of subjects has never been collectively tackled before. Also Justin is put on the hot seat for the new segment Questions From The Crowd. DJ and Justin go crazy with their love for the television show 24. And the boys try and figure out films by their last line in the new game Simplistic Last Lines. All that and more on this new episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.
NOTES
Jack & Nina
The End Of Every Episode Of Police Squad
MUSIC
Fast Times Club By Idols
Gold Medal By Sounds Like Sander
4. For Losing It By The Triads
Tuesday Jul 03, 2018
Tuesday Jul 03, 2018
Ring of the Musketeers
PG-13
1992 ‧ Action/Adventure ‧ 1h 26m
As descendants of the original Three Musketeers, Peter Porthos (Thomas Gottschalk), John Smith D'Artagnan (David Hasselhoff) and Anne-Marie Athos (Alison Doody) are continuing the chivalrous tradition of protecting those who can't protect themselves, carrying it into the modern age. Rather than fighting lords and counts, these Musketeers have the Mafia to deal with, but they're aided by reformed burglar Burt Aramis (Cheech Marin), the newly knighted fourth Musketeer.
Initial release: December 1, 1992 (Germany)Director: John ParagonProduction company: Motion Picture Corporation of AmericaScreenplay: John Paragon, Joel SurnowProducers:Brad Krevoy, Steven Stabler
Plug that VHS player back in! It time for some David Hasselhoff! That's right, today we watch the Ring of the Musketeers. A made for TV film that... well... nobody remembers. But when you have a modern day (90's) Musketeers film that has a cast that contains the Hoff, Cheech Marin, Alison Doody, John Rhys-Davies, Corbin Bernsen, Timothy Stack, Ricky Jay and Branscombe Richmond. You pretty much stop whatever you are doing and pop this VHS in.
So fix that tracking and enjoy that mono audio (yes this VHS wasn't in stereo) and repeat, Unus pro omnibus, omnes pro uno! Because we do this together ladies and gents! This is the Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary of Ring of the Musketeers!
Tuesday Jul 03, 2018
Tuesday Jul 03, 2018
Ring of the Musketeers
PG-13
1992 ‧ Action/Adventure ‧ 1h 26m
As descendants of the original Three Musketeers, Peter Porthos (Thomas Gottschalk), John Smith D'Artagnan (David Hasselhoff) and Anne-Marie Athos (Alison Doody) are continuing the chivalrous tradition of protecting those who can't protect themselves, carrying it into the modern age. Rather than fighting lords and counts, these Musketeers have the Mafia to deal with, but they're aided by reformed burglar Burt Aramis (Cheech Marin), the newly knighted fourth Musketeer.
Initial release: December 1, 1992 (Germany)Director: John ParagonProduction company: Motion Picture Corporation of AmericaScreenplay: John Paragon, Joel SurnowProducers:Brad Krevoy, Steven Stabler
Plug that VHS player back in! It time for some David Hasselhoff! That's right, today we watch the Ring of the Musketeers. A made for TV film that... well... nobody remembers. But when you have a modern day (90's) Musketeers film that has a cast that contains the Hoff, Cheech Marin, Alison Doody, John Rhys-Davies, Corbin Bernsen, Timothy Stack, Ricky Jay and Branscombe Richmond. You pretty much stop whatever you are doing and pop this VHS in.
So fix that tracking and enjoy that mono audio (yes this VHS wasn't in stereo) and repeat, Unus pro omnibus, omnes pro uno! Because we do this together ladies and gents! This is the Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary of Ring of the Musketeers!
Monday Jun 11, 2018
Monday Jun 11, 2018
School might be out for summer, but not the Simplistic Reviews Podcast. We are back with special guest Dan "The Comic Book Concierge" Clark from The GeekCast Radio Network and CinemaGeeks Podcast, a couple of call-in friends of ours stop by, and we discuss everything from IHOP changing to IHOB, Hailee Steinfeld having Shape Of Water sex with an Autobot, and of course, the real problem with Hitler...you're gonna have to listen to find out what the hell that means on a brand new episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.
NOTES
IHOB
David Tyree
Get A Life
MUSIC
Neon Love By Jeff Dale, Gavin Harrison, and Tim Reilly
Five Dollar Bill By Jason Pedder & Ben Ziapour
Midnight Ride By Richard Kimmings & Jason Pedder
Variety Time By Tim Garland
Saturday Jun 02, 2018
Saturday Jun 02, 2018
Justice League
PG-13 2017 ‧ Fantasy/Science fiction film ‧ 2 hours
Fuelled by his restored faith in humanity, and inspired by Superman's selfless act, Bruce Wayne enlists newfound ally Diana Prince to face an even greater threat. Together, Batman and Wonder Woman work quickly to recruit a team to stand against this newly-awakened enemy. Despite the formation of an unprecedented league of heroes in Batman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Cyborg and the Flash, it may be too late to save the planet from an assault of catastrophic proportions.
Initial release: November 15, 2017 (Sweden)
Director: Zack Snyder
Initial DVD release: March 13, 2018 (USA)
Box office: 657.9 million USD
Well... like DJ mentioned, we kept going with these damn DCU movie commentaries. We didn't really want to watch JL but we had to get it over with.
But hey it is still better then Batman V Superman Dawn of Justice, that's something right? Don't worry we will get back to the crappy but fun films that include a good old T&A drinking game.
So sit back and enjoy a okay film that's somewhat coherent and looks a ton better then Dawn of Justice. Grab that beer and laugh at the terrible CG... and that laughable mustache removal...man that was horrible.
Oh and we added a new gimmick. Starting with Justice League, after every movie commentary we'll spin a wheel to find out what we watch next. Fun stuff!
Today we took a spin on our new wheel!!!
We spun The Wheel of Doom (TM) a collection of request films by viewers like you!
...and we get something odd. Hint: It involves the Musketeers and David Hasselhoff...yep the HOFF...nothing but fun...
Hey did you know: Justice League is the fourth-most-expensive film ever made. Amazing is it not?! wikipedia.org
Friday Jun 01, 2018
Friday Jun 01, 2018
Justice League
PG-13 2017 ‧ Fantasy/Science fiction film ‧ 2 hours
Fuelled by his restored faith in humanity, and inspired by Superman's selfless act, Bruce Wayne enlists newfound ally Diana Prince to face an even greater threat. Together, Batman and Wonder Woman work quickly to recruit a team to stand against this newly-awakened enemy. Despite the formation of an unprecedented league of heroes in Batman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Cyborg and the Flash, it may be too late to save the planet from an assault of catastrophic proportions.
Initial release: November 15, 2017 (Sweden)
Director: Zack Snyder
Initial DVD release: March 13, 2018 (USA)
Box office: 657.9 million USD
Well... like DJ mentioned, we kept going with these damn DCU movie commentaries. We didn't really want to watch JL but we had to get it over with.
But hey it is still better then Batman V Superman Dawn of Justice, that's something right? Don't worry we will get back to the crappy but fun films that include a good old T&A drinking game.
So sit back and enjoy a okay film that's somewhat coherent and looks a ton better then Dawn of Justice. Grab that beer and laugh at the terrible CG... and that laughable mustache removal...man that was horrible.
Oh and we added a new gimmick. Starting with Justice League, after every movie commentary we'll spin a wheel to find out what we watch next. Fun stuff!
Today we took a spin on our new wheel!!!
We spun The Wheel of Doom (TM) a collection of request films by viewers like you!
...and we get something odd. Hint: It involves the Musketeers and David Hasselhoff...yep the HOFF...nothing but fun...
Hey did you know: Justice League is the fourth-most-expensive film ever made. Amazing is it not?! wikipedia.org